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“Mimi, about the party…”
I turn to leave, already feeling the tears in my eyes.
“Wait,” he says, holding me in place. “Please?”
The pain in his voice makes me freeze. It’s like he knows how to control me. “What?” I finally utter.
“It’s not what you think.”
“Then what is it?” I turn and look into his eyes. The ones that enchanted me before as sparkling diamonds now make me think of broken glass.
Sebastian sighs and looks about; he scratches his arm in nervousness. “Look, I don’t regret what we were doing. I don’t—” he looks me up and down, and I cover up. “I don’t at all. In fact, it was damn hot. It was—” he shuts himself up. “But that’s not the point. I’m just, I’m not in a good mindset. I was confused, jealous, and angry—”
“At who?” I cut in. “You broke up with Lindsey. She’s moved on. It’s been a while.” I’m trying to find excuses to keep my dream alive.
“I know, I know. And you’re completely right. I just, it’s hard because I’ve known you for so long… and you're Carlos’ sister.”
“Really? Because I’m the sibling of someone, I’m out of bounds? Is that what it’s always been?” I feel like I’m being overly dramatic. I’ve never been like this after a casual fling. But then this wasn’t a casualflingfor me. This felt like fate.
“No, don’t be like that.”
“Like what? Hurt?”
“Come on, that’s not fair,” Sebastian says, gripping my arms with his warm hands.
I know it’s not fair, but it’s not stopping me from using it. “Was I just another hookup?”
“Never,” he utters. “You were just…” but he doesn’t finish. He sighs. “Nevermind.”
“No, tell me,” I push. “I’m sick of being the little sister of Carlos. At least treat me like the adult version of me you decided to have sex with.” I’ve poked the bear now. His eyes flash, and I can tell his temper will flare. But I don’t care. A week of silences and excuses, a life of waiting for him to justrun away.
“It’s not that,” he finally says with a level voice. “It’s that…” but he still can’t find the words.
I’m too frustrated at him to even wait around and hear them. I’m too hurt. I’ve got my answer anyway.
He lets me walk past, and I flee the office. I feel like the biggest idiot. I feel like a selfish brat for acting like the way I am, yet in the same heartbeat, I don’t care. I feel like he led me on with all that flirting and talking. We were hot and dirty in the pantry one moment, now I just feel stale and stupid.
I go to the bathroom and cool down for a few minutes before going back outside to the pool. Luca isn’t there, and he’s taken the cocktail with him. Sophie is by herself and laying by the pool. I sit silently beside her and put my hat on. She’s got her eyes closed, and I’m grateful that we lie in silence for the next half an hour.
Finally, Sophie makes a noise, and I realize she’s been asleep the whole time.
Having calmed down since speaking to Sebastian, I laugh at her wake up. “Now I know your secret for keeping energy with Michael. All this mother’s superpowers bull crap, you’re just napping,” I tease and flick her arm.
She smiles and wipes some drool from the corner of her mouth. She turns over onto her front. “Yes, yes, the secret is out.” She reaches up and takes a sip of her warm drink. “So how was chatting with Sebastian?”
My lips tighten, and I feel a flare of betrayal again. “Nothing out of the usual.”
“Really?” Sophie looks at me over her sunglasses. “I’m not blind. You were trailing after him and those big muscles quite eagerly.”
“Well, it’s nothing,” I grunt and sit up. I search for more drink, but I’ve finished my cocktail; swishing the glass around won’t make any magically appear either. I sigh. “It’s just stupid stuff.”
“I saw you guys talking at the party,” Sophie says. “You guys had a bit of chemistry.”
“Whatever chemistry you may have seen,” I roll onto my front too. “Is dead. He was pretty clear on his thoughts about me being there.” I don’t mention the fact that while Sophie was asleep, Sebastian passed back by with Luca and looked like he was longing to come and speak with me but was unable to do so.
“I dunno,” she says. “He’s just—Sebastian is a cautious man. He might just need time with you?”
“And you’re the dating expert?” I say, glancing at her.
