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“I’m not surprised he chose her mother. That woman is terrified of him. When I was there doing Nella’s makeup, she wouldn’t sit still long enough to take a photo. She probably downed an entire bottle of wine just to keep it together. She pretends to not know what’s going on, but I doubt that’s the truth.”
My hands find my hips as I nod. “It makes sense. He’s a monster that doesn’t give a shit about anyone unless they serve a purpose for him. Wife, daughter, son. Anyone. They’re all pawns.”
“Well, you would know better than anyone about that, Killian.”
I sigh at her words. Unfortunately, she is right. I’ve had the displeasure of having multiple encounters with him, including him killing my own flesh and blood because of territorial differences. If I’d had the opportunity beforehand, I would’ve slapped cement shoes onto him and tossed him right into the river while gleefully singing a tune to his death.
“You should keep watch over Nella.” Ava stands. “Make sure that she sleeps okay. I’m going to figure out the schedule for the morning and move some of our meetings around. We need to contact your informant and get a scoop on what the hell happened.”
“Alright.” I drop my hands to my sides. “I’ll call and see what the next steps are. Let me know when you’re back and we’ll go meet up.”
“Sounds good.”
I wake up when the door to my bedroom slowly closes. The sound of footsteps heading over to my bed alerts me that there is someone in my room. I roll over onto my side, spotting Killian leaning over me, a hand placed next to my hip.
“You should be asleep.”
“I tried. Every time I close my eyes, all I see is my mother screaming in pain.”
Killian slowly pulls himself onto the bed and lays down next to me. I run my hands over Leo, his warm body curled up in the space between us. Of all the things wrong right now, this is a place of peace.
“Tell me something,” I say softly into the darkness.
“Anything?”
“What did you want to be when you grew up?”
Killian’s quiet for a while, barely any sound coming from him other than his slow breathing. For a moment, I think he’s fallen asleep, bewitched by the same magic that eludes me now.
He surprises me when he speaks again.
“This life is all I’ve ever known, so I’m not sure. When I graduated high school, I did entertain the idea of not ending up following in my father’s footsteps, so I studied in Europe. But every time I came back to Chicago, I knew my fate was sealed.”
He shrugs at me in the darkness.
“I’m good at leading anyway. I get what I need to get done and put my family first. It’s exactly what my father taught me to do.”
I smile a little. “It’s nice that you thought about something other than this life, though. Other possibilities. Even if you ended up on this path in the long run.”
“What about you, Nella? What were your dreams?”
I sigh softly. “The only wish I ever had was to join my father and brother. Clearly that never happened and was never going to. So, I suppose I just wasted my life. I have no idea what I would’ve wanted to do if I wasn’t a part of my family. I never entertained the idea and now I guess I’m paying for it.”
He shifts on the bed next to me, folding an arm under his head.
“You’re good at knitting, Nella. I peeked at the things you made while you weren’t talking to me.”
I huff out a laugh. Even when we were at odds, Killian still took the time to check on me, to find out what I was up to. It flatters me, really.
“I can’t exactly make a career out of knitting blankets for cats.” I run my hand over Leo’s head again. “All I know is this city. The people my father has worked with. And when I think about it, I’d rather die than go back to the financial district.”
“You don’t need to do anything that you don’t want to.”
His tone is serious in the same kind of way he speaks when talking about my family. Firm and unmoving.
“You have all the time in the world to figure yourself out. Now that you’re no longer under your father’s thumb, you can do whatever you want. The possibilities are entirely up to you.”
It’s scary to think that there’s a whole world out there waiting for me to discover it. Even if I did have all of my life to figure out who I was, where was I going to start? The idea scares me.
