Page 57 of The Coldest Winter


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That was true. The bigger the crowd, the more people I’d have to avoid having conversations with. People loved small talk, but I hated it.

“About how many people are coming?” I asked, now concerned that I agreed to show up.

“Nope! No take backs. You said you’ll be there, so now you have to show up.” Right before I could answer, Starlet walked past the two of us. Tom let out a low whistle. “She’s so fucking hot, man.”

“What?” I snapped, taken aback by his words.

“Hey, Ms. Evans! I like your hair today,” he said with a singsong tone over to Starlet, making her turn to look toward us.

Her eyes locked with mine briefly before she turned toward Tom. “Thank you, Tom, that’s very kind of you.”

“It’s really nice. Then again, everything looks nice on you, Ms. Evans,” he flirted.

Yup.

That was right.

He was flirting with my secret friend that I wanted to be more than a friend with, and rage built inside me that I wasn’t even able to act on. Secrets were fun.

Starlet smiled. Damn. I wished that smile were against my mouth. “I’m not the one grading your homework this week, Tom. No need to suck up to me. I’ll see you both in class.”

I’d hoped she’d look back at me one more time, but she didn’t. She was too much of a professional for that.

As she walked away, Tom’s eyes followed the movement of her hips.

“Dude,” I said, shoving him. “That’s our teacher.”

“Student teacher. She’s pretty much our age. You know, after my birthday, I bet I’d even have a shot with her.”

“Don’t hold your breath,” I muttered.

Tom shrugged as we continued on our way to class. “You’re probably right. If she were ever going to go for a student, it would probably be you, seeing how I think she has a crush.”

The words threw me for a loop, and I almost tripped over my own feet as Tom popped another Jolly Rancher into his mouth.

I narrowed my eyes at him, somewhat trying to convince myself that he didn’t say what I thought he’d said.

“What?” I asked.

“I think Ms. Evans has the hots for you,” he repeated.

My chest tightened. “What the hell are you talking about?”

He raked his hand through his hair. “I just noticed how she stares at you when she hands out assignments. She lingers.”

“That’s bullshit,” I muttered, walking faster. “She looks at everyone the same.”

“Maybe, dude. But if you ever get the chance to unlock that door…please, for the good of all of us guys who have daydreamed about her, walk through it. Because I would screw her in a heartbeat.”

“People don’t daydream about Ms. Evans,” I said, trying to hide my annoyance as my hands formed fists.

“Are you kidding me? Everyone talks about that woman. Even Chris talks about her! Well, okay, he doesn’t talk, but he looks. How could he not? She’s like a damn supermodel. Her curves…” He bit his fist and rolled his eyes as if he were getting off from the idea of her alone.

“Chill, man. That’s our teacher.”

“I bet if I had the chance, I’d teach her a few things myself.”

Rage.

Straight-up rage was all I felt.

I knew we were friends and all, but man…I wanted to punch Tom square in the jaw for talking about screwing my girl.

Well, my secret girl.

My secret friend.

What the hell ever it was that we were.

I was in a shitty mood now.

Fuck Tom. Fuck him and his daydreams about the girl who wasn’t openly mine but was…mine. And I was hers. Completely fucking hers.

“You can’t look at me like that,” I told Starlet as I walked into our study room after school.

“Like what?” Her eyes were on me, and I felt it all: her gentleness, her care, and her falling for me.

“Like that,” I said, gesturing toward her. “Like when you see me…you actually see me.”

“I don’t know how to stop that. Besides,” she confessed, shrugging her shoulders, “you look at me the same way.”

I couldn’t argue with that fact.

But I was still in a pissy mood. I was annoyed that Tom and other guys were checking her out and talking about how they wanted to screw her brains out. During the class, I watched how all the guys' eyes seemed pinned on her, and it only made me angrier. Could I blame them for their attraction? Of course not. Did it piss me off? Absolutely.

If it had been any other girl I’d previously fooled around with, I couldn’t have given a rat’s ass about their attraction to said girl. But Starlet was different. She wasn’t like those girls. She was my person. Precious, unique, weird, and mine. Solely, undeniably, mine.

She arched an eyebrow. “What’s wrong with you?”

“Nothing,” I shot out. “I’m fine.”

“You’re grumpy.”

“I’m not.”

“You’re grimacing.”

“I’m not,” I growled.

She laughed at me. Yup, she laughed as if my annoyance were tickling her. “You’re so weird. What’s going on?”

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