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I was trying so fucking hard—all for her.
I’d been on the sertraline for a week now, and I was beginning to notice subtle differences, like not wanting to run away from her anymore when she began to fuss, and though my heart rate definitely sped up as my anxiety levels spiked, I didn’t feel like I couldn’t breathe when she was wailing.
Dr. Gresham assured me that it was beginning to work and to just keep trying, keep pushing forward.
“We’re g-g-going to get through this t-together,” I told Hope as I moved around the kitchen, trying to put together a bottle with one hand as I held her in the other. My speech was already messing up though. I didn’t know how long I’d last.
Especially when her screaming kept getting louder.
“God, this isn’t w-w-w-working,” I whispered, getting frustrated. I moved her so she was face to chest with me. Her cries instantly quieted, a soft yawn falling from her lips. I stared down at her in amazement as she fell back asleep, her little lips parted.
Tears flooded my eyes. “I d-did it,” I whispered in astonishment. “Holy shit, b-baby girl, I got you c-c-calm.”
“West?” Jessie asked. “I heard Hope—”
He stopped when he walked into the kitchen, his eyes widening in shock before a grin that warmed my heart and caused butterflies to erupt in my stomach lit up his face.
“You did it, baby,” he breathed as he moved toward me.
I nodded, moving my other hand to cup the back of her head, holding her to me. I drew in a shuddered breath, my bottom lip trembling. “I was able to c-calm her,” I choked out.
Jessie cupped my face in his calloused hands and pressed his lips to mine. “Just keep taking your medicine,” he told me softly, “and you’ll be able to do this easily in no time,” he assured me.
I looked down at my little girl as she slept peacefully against my chest, her little lips parted, her breath fanning across my skin. “She likes the sound of your heartbeat,” he told me. “It’s familiar to her.”
I moved around Jessie and into the living room, going to the recliner. I sat down and began to rock her, never letting her go as I held her. Jessie pressed a soft, gentle kiss to my forehead. “I’m going to finish the car. Come get me if you need me.” He brushed the pad of his thumb over my bottom lip. “But I know you’ve got this, baby girl. So fucking strong.”
“For her,” I told him.
“For you,” he corrected me. “The rest of us, including Hope, we just get to see the beauty your strength brings out in you.”
My lips trembled. “I love you,” I told him.
He grinned down at me. “I love you, too, baby girl.”
Lincoln
When I pulled up to the house later that evening, Jessie was sitting on the porch with a grin on his face as he watched West. Our woman was laying on a blanket on the ground, and she was on her stomach as she did tummy time with Hope.
My heart swelled at the beautiful image West and Hope made together. There was nothing in this world more beautiful than those two together.
Jessie got up and walked over to me as I slid out of my truck, my boots thumping on the dirt-packed driveway. “When did this happen?” I asked him, my eyes not leaving West and Hope.
Jessie stuffed his hands in his pockets, turning to watch as West giggled at Hope when she attempted rolling, but only got onto her side before she flopped back over onto her stomach.
“Hope was screaming earlier while I was changing the oil in the car. But West—fuck, bro, she got up and took care of Hope by herself. By the time I finally heard the screaming and came into the house, West was in the kitchen with a half-made bottle of formula on the counter with Hope sleeping against her chest. She hasn’t let Hope out of her sight since.”
My heart clenched in my chest. “She’s making progress,” I gruffly commented, so much love for our woman swirling through my veins. “The medication is finally beginning to work, and she’s able to handle Hope. She feels stronger, and I can tell she definitely feels better as a mom.”
Jessie clapped me on the back. “Go on and shower.” He grinned as he watched West slowly demonstrate rolling over as if Hope would understand it. I chuckled at the sight. “I think our woman deserves some celebratory sex tonight.”
A wicked grin crossed my lips as I ran my eyes over West’s curvy frame. “Fuck yes, she does,” I growled. I moved towards the porch. “Dinner?” I asked him.
He shrugged. “Been preoccupied watching those two together.” I shrugged in return because I understood. Watching West interact with Hope—happy and carefree—it was a hell of a lot more than we could ever ask for, and yet, it was happening right in front of us.
