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He looked horrified. Worry clenched my gut. Something was wrong.
“Jessie, who was that?” I asked him, my eyes not leaving Lincoln’s back. Lincoln’s muscles tensed as he ran his hand roughly down his face.
“Probably best if Lincoln tells you, baby girl,” Jessie told me softly. I turned to face him, ripping my eyes from Lincoln. Jessie reached up and cupped my neck, his thumb brushing lightly over my jaw. “It’s Lincoln’s story to tell, baby,” he told me when I opened my mouth to protest. “Just know tonight is probably about to be a really long night, and we need to be there for him.”
I stood up as Lincoln moved back toward us, pulling his phone from his ear. He swallowed thickly. He looked so lost and distressed.
“Mom overdosed,” he said, his voice hoarse. I knew his mom was a piece of shit, but I’d had no idea he still cared so much about her. It gutted me to know he was hurting. “They’re doing their best to save her, but they don’t think they’re going to be able to.”
“Lincoln,” I whispered as I quickly moved toward him.
As soon as my arms were wrapped around his waist, he broke down in tears.
And my heart broke for him.
Lincoln hadn’t stopped pacing since we stepped foot into the waiting room of the hospital. I was curled against Jessie’s side, and he was rubbing my back, but he knew there was nothing he could do to help the rising tension in my body.
Lincoln was hurting, and he wouldn’t lean on me.
He was blocking me out.
After he had dried his tears and he and Jessie got everything cleaned up, Lincoln had gone completely silent on me. And the last time I had reached out to touch his arm in a silent offer of comfort, he had literally brushed my hand off.
It fucking hurt, but I knew how he was feeling, so I did my best not to take it to heart.
I was just terrified that like me, Lincoln would destroy everyone in his path to make himself feel a little bit better. And while I knew I would understand it, I knew if he said something hateful to me, it would gut me. I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to move past it.
“Lincoln Reeds?” a doctor asked as he came out of the back.
Lincoln quickly met the doctor halfway across the room. “Let’s go to a counseling room,” the doctor said.
Lincoln shook his head. “Tell me here,” Lincoln ordered. I swallowed thickly. If the doctor wanted to go to a consultation room, it wasn’t good news.
The doctor sighed, an empathetic look passing over his features. “Lincoln, your mother passed.” I sucked in a sharp breath of air, and Lincoln’s shoulders and back tensed. “We did everything we could, but we were too late in saving her. I’m sorry.”
Lincoln turned on his heel without another word, striding out of the hospital. I jumped up from the chair I’d been sitting in, rushing after him. “Lincoln, stop!” I shouted. I rushed to catch up to him, but he was moving too fast.
“Go the fuck away, West,” he barked over his shoulder.
I flinched. “Lincoln, please,” I begged him, my voice breaking. “Please, just let me help you.”
He stormed back over to me, his blue eyes ice cold as he stared down at me. I flinched, longing for the warmth and love that used to be in his gaze every time he looked at me. I knew he was hurting. I knew he was lashing out, and I was taking the brunt of it.
I understood all of it.
But it didn’t make it hurt any fucking less.
“I don’t want your fucking help,” he growled down at me. Tears welled in my eyes. “How the fuck do you plan to help me anyway, West?” he demanded to know. My bottom lip trembled. He was about to say something I knew he’d later regret, but I couldn’t bring myself to open my mouth. “You can’t even fucking help yourself. Tell Jessie to get you a fucking cab home.”
With that, he stormed away from me. I hated my speech impediment more than ever at that moment because I was too overwhelmed to say anything, to beg him to stay with me.
This felt like we were done.
How had one of the most beautiful nights of my life turned into something so horrifying?
Jessie rushed up to me. “Where’s Lincoln?” he asked me.
I turned to face him, tears pouring down my cheeks. My chest physically hurt. I sobbed and bit hard on my bottom lip to keep from screaming. Jessie’s eyes widened, panic residing in their dark depths.
“Fuck, no, he did not just walk away from you,” he breathed.
I nodded as I rubbed at my chest, unable to breathe. I was panicking. I knew that. But I couldn’t stop it.
