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“I believe so.” As I stared into Aric’s steady amber gaze, I found myself saying, “But I remember thinking that if I met him power for power, we would destroy the world.” Either that or my body would give out, like poor Tess’s had. “I’ve always feared unleashing the red witch, but I finally understood what would happen if I tapped into that bottomless pit. Aric, I don’t come back from that scenario. It’s the nuclear option.”
I would become the homicidal witch forever, my hair permanently red, claws forever at the ready—my self-control gone.
“You would have to return. You’d muster the strength to rise once again.”
“If I’d taken Richter down that night, I would’ve killed Joules and Kentarch as well. If the witch rules me, will I be able to stop myself from killing you?” Her thoughts had begun to infiltrate my own, her lust for icons and immortality surfacing at times in my mind.
“You’ll find a way. And besides, nothing matters more than keeping you and our child safe. My life would be a small price to pay.”
I drew my head back. “How easily you talk about dying. About leaving us.”
“I don’t wish to die, sieva. I finally have more than this game to live for, and I am desperate to experience a new life with my family. I’m going to stay with you for as long as I can.”
Somewhat mollified, I said, “Good.”
His phone pinged with a text message. Though my heart still clamored over Aric’s words, I was tempted to grab that phone and call Jack.
Yet hearing his voice might send me into a tailspin. He must think so too; he hadn’t asked to speak with me in all this time.
“What is it? Are the guys okay?” Apparently, Sol had attacked them with an army of Bagmen. But I couldn’t really see the Sun Card as the aggressor like that.
“They are fine.” Aric pocketed the phone. “They managed to make good time today toward Louisiana.” Fresh from my dream, I wished I was going there too. “And the Chariot is doing better.”
According to Jack’s last update, Kentarch had teleported Issa’s body and one bottle of Tusker beer to Africa, laying her to rest at the foot of a mountain significant to his family. He’d returned, focused and committed to soldier on.
Could that level of confusion just disappear? I hoped so. I hoped he’d broken free of the loop he’d been caught in.
“What do you and Jack usually text about?”
“Their progress,” Aric said. “And he relates anything from the others he thinks might help us overturn the game. I’ve told him no detail is too small.”
This was interesting. “Like what?”
“The Archangel said his sect’s elders told stories about nudging the gods into doing something. According to them, a hero first had to garner the gods’ attention, then make a precious sacrifice.”
“Well, it just so happens that I’d like to nudge them about something. So how do we get their attention?”
“My question exactly. Jack thinks you basically have to be the loudest non-god on earth. A megaphone.”
“Any idea what a good sacrifice might be?” Ogen, the Devil Card, had hungered for them. Circe too.
“I know much about the history of sacrifices, but the subject is not one I wish to ponder at present.” His uneasy glance dropped to my belly.
Ah. First-born stuff. Gods were shitty.
Then I recalled the vision Matthew had sent me of the ten of swords. He’d asked, What would you sacrifice? What would you endure?
Had Aric and I gotten the gods’ attention that first night we’d made love? When I’d conceived Tee?
Just as uneasy, I said, “I should go start on breakfast.”
“Allow me. Why not relax awhile?”
“I like to keep busy, and sourcing food is enjoyable when it’s right there.”
Collecting the eggs and milk had soothed me. At least it had until the last couple of weeks when the awkwardness between me and Aric had morphed into something else entirely.
Down in that plant-filled nursery, he and I experienced a symphony of little tortures. When I’d raised my face to the sunlamps and sighed with pleasure, he’d clenched his fists and turned away. Same when I’d bent over to collect a sprig of rosemary, and his focus had drifted to my chest.
How long could he continue to turn away? How long did I want him to?
Resuming my relationship with Aric had begun to feel inevitable. I desired him just as much as he did me. Each time he emerged from the bathroom, with just a towel around his hips below his damp, tattooed chest, I would melt with longing.
Physically, I was beyond ready. Emotionally, my love for Jack got in the way of my love for Aric.
I rose from the bed, then frowned at the strangled sound he made. “Aric?” I followed his gaze down. “Whoa.” My enlarged breasts strained against my gown. Growth spurt? I’d put on weight overnight.
