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“We have to find a way to separate him from her,” Kieran tells me. “She’s draining the life from him. The label is trying to figure something out. Some sort of deal to send him to rehab but getting him to agree is unlikely.”
My eyes drift to the hospital door, and I swallow my pain. “Is she in there now?”
“No,” Kieran sighs. “She took off as soon as the cops showed up, but it won’t be long before she pops up again. We don’t have a lot of time.”
My phone chimes, and an icy feeling of dread curls its fingers around my throat, constricting my breath. I don’t want to look at it, but I’m afraid not to. I drag my finger over the notification to see the latest threats from Adam.
Where the fuck are you, Bianca?
Get your ass back home. Don’t make this worse than you already have.
I’m fucking waiting.
Do you really want to play this game?
You think I can’t find you because you turned off your GPS?
Why are you doing this to me? Can’t you see how much I love you?
I’m going to put a bullet in my head if you don’t come home.
Five goddamn minutes. That’s how long you have before your cat disappears. And you know what will happen next. COME. HOME. NOW.
My fingers tremble as I turn off the phone and slide it into my pocket. My nerves are shot, and I can barely breathe, knowing what might await me when I return home. I put everything on the line to come here, but I had to, and I would do it all over again. For Madden.
Adam’s emotional warfare has eaten away at every shred of my sanity, and I’ve devised my own methods of circumventing his attacks. He hasn’t figured out yet that I sent my cat to live with my cousins. And his threats against my parents can’t have an immediate impact since they’re out of town this weekend. These are things I can control for a small period, but I’ll have to pay the consequences when I return.
The bruises on my throat are a painful reminder of that. His volatility is becoming more and more unpredictable. He used to be able to control his temper when we were in public. Nobody else would notice the subtle shift in his voice or the change in his eyes, but I knew exactly what it meant for me. He could be charming everyone around him, but internally, a bomb was scheduled to detonate the moment we walked through closed doors.
Before, he’d leave his bruises in places nobody else would see. He’d be careful about it because he couldn’t have people thinking he was a monster. But lately, he doesn’t care where we are. He’ll drag me into a bathroom at a public restaurant and choke me if he feels like it. And as I’ve pulled further and further away, shutting down and disconnecting my emotions, he’s only become more vicious.
He has me trapped, and if I step out of line, I’ll feel his wrath. There is no consequence too extreme for Adam. He’s filed reports against me at the police department. He’s brought my parents into his campaign of terror, persuading them I have to be locked up when I don’t play by the rules. He has everyone around me convinced I’m the one who’s crazy. And if I don’t do what he says, he threatens the people I love, including his own brother. I’ve come to accept that I don’t know what he’s truly capable of. So I’ve kept my secrets. I’ve buried my pain and hidden the bruises and prayed for it all to end more times than I can count.
But I’m still here. My heart is still beating. And I’d rather die than live in a world where Madden doesn’t exist. So I lift my chin and tell myself to be strong. I have to be stronger than I’ve ever been to walk into that room and convince the only man I’ve ever loved that he isn’t going to leave me in this fucking world alone. Because our story isn’t even close to over.
“Are you okay?” Kieran touches my shoulder, and I flinch. He frowns, taking a step back and holding up his hands. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.”
“No, I’m sorry.” I wipe the moisture leaking from the corner of my eyes. “I just… got lost for a minute. Do you mind if I go in now?”
“Please.” He gestures to the door. “I’ll be right here if you need me.”
I reach out and touch the handle as a wave of nerves crashes over me. I haven’t seen Madden in person since I left Bethesda. I could have stayed there in that bubble with him forever before everything came crashing down. I would have done anything to take his pain away then. But, by the grace of God, he sent me away when he realized Adam had been to see me. It was an unimaginable heartbreak at the time, but it was also the thing that ultimately saved him from Adam’s twisted games.
