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I take a deep breath, feeling a weight lifted off my shoulders. "That's exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you, Chester. I'm looking forward to learning more from you and finding some peace and clarity during this retreat."
"You're welcome, Jack. I'm glad I could help," Chester says. "But I have to ask, have you ever thought about finding a romantic partner? Someone to share your journey with and support you on your path to finding balance and harmony?"
I shake my head. "To be honest, Chester, I don't think that's something I'll ever be able to have. I have a lot of issues that make it difficult for me to form meaningful relationships with people."
Chester frowns, looking concerned. "I understand that it can be tough, but I don't think you should give up hope. Everyone has issues. A romantic partner can provide a lot of support and help you achieve your goals, both personally and professionally. Take me, for example. I wouldn't have been able to create this yoga center without the help and support of my loving wife, Josefina. She's been with me every step of the way and has been a constant source of love and encouragement. Not to mention fulfillment. And fun.” He wiggles his eyebrows.
"I see what you mean. But to be honest, I'm not even sure if I want kids or a traditional family life. I'm not sure what I really want out of life.”
"That's okay," Chester says. "It's not uncommon to feel uncertain about what we want out of life, especially at your age. But I think the key is to keep an open mind and be open to new experiences and opportunities. Who knows, you might find that a romantic partner and a family are exactly what you need to help you achieve your goals and find happiness."
I nod, feeling a little more hopeful. Maybe Chester is right. Maybe I shouldn't give up on the idea of finding a romantic partner just yet.
As we continue to talk, I become aware of a presence behind me. I turn to see Amelia standing a few feet away, pretending to be interested in a display of yoga mats. It's clear that she's been listening in on our conversation, and I feel a little embarrassed. I'm not used to discussing my feelings and personal issues with others, but it seems like Chester has a way of getting people to open up.
After a few more minutes Chester leaves, and I try to focus on the business book I’m reading. But Amelia's big brown eyes keep flashing at me, drawing my attention away from the pages.
I’d love to have a full blown conversation with her, but I'm also trying to respect the "quiet hours" rule. We’re supposed to not speak unless spoken to. I don't want to be rude and ignore her completely, but I also don't want to encourage her too much.
She reaches out and touches my arm.
“Hey. You want to go for a quick walk to the beach before class?” She flashes her eyes at me. “Friend.”
I look up at her, trying to gauge her intentions. It's hard to tell with Amelia, she's always so hard to read.
Except, you know, when she’s riding my face.
I decide to go for it, anything is better than sitting here in silence.
"Sure," I say, closing my book and standing up. "I could use some fresh air."
We walk down the stairs and out onto the beach. It's a beautiful day, the sun is shining and the water is crystal clear. Amelia looks hot even in her short shorts and tank top, her light hair blowing in the breeze.
As we walk, I notice the way she keeps glancing at me. It's almost like she's trying to figure me out.
"What's on your mind?" I ask, breaking the silence.
"I overheard you earlier," she admits, looking down at the sand. "Talking to Chester about not wanting a traditional family and kids. I must say, it’s interesting to hear your genuine views on relationships. It’s cute."
I feel a pang of guilt wash over me. I hadn't meant for her to hear that.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean for you to overhear that," I say, rubbing the back of my neck. "It's just something I've been thinking about a lot lately. I'm not sure if I want a traditional family and kids or not."
"Why not?" she asks, looking up at me with those big brown eyes.
I shrug, feeling vulnerable. "I don't know. It's just something that's been weighing on my mind. I guess I'm not sure if I'm ready for that kind of commitment."
She nods, seeming to understand. "Well, I can relate to that. My fiancé and I just took a break because he wasn't sure if he wanted a traditional family and kids either."
“You’re on a break? Or you broke up?”
She shrugs. “We said maybe we’ll revisit things at some point. We left it open. We don’t speak really. It’s been over a month now since the breakup.”
"What do you want?" I ask, curious.
"I want a traditional family and kids," she says, a hint of sadness in her voice. "But it's not up to me, it's up to my partner as well. And if they can't commit to that, then it's not meant to be. I feel for you. I’ve had to start to accept that as well, that maybe I don’t get to have kids. But at the bottom of my heart, I’m hopeful."
I nod, feeling a sense of respect for her. It takes a lot of courage to admit what you really want and to be willing to walk away from something that isn't right for you.
