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I sigh.“It’s sad.I’ve always wanted a brother or sister.I’ve grown up mostly alone.I’ve got my friend Debbie, but beyond her and my dad, I don’t have anything resembling a family.”
“You have me now, Clara.”
She laughs.I wouldn’t have noticed before due to the shower, but there are tears in her eyes when she talks of her own loneliness.It’s like no one has ever asked her about this or shown her care before.“You’re my employer.Just like with Irene.”
“You’re a whole lot different than her.Prettier, for one.”
She chuckles.“I won’t tell her you said that.”
“And you’re more than an employee to me.I may be paying you but I can’t pretend this is nothing but professional.”
“You’re really something, Sebastian.”She sniffles.I take her into my arms, holding her as the hot water rains down on us.“I never would have expected the weird rich guy putting up creepy internet ads would be the first guy to actually treat me well.”
“I’ve roughly taken your virginity, fucked you over my dining table, handcuffed you and fucked your ass.I continually call you my willing vessel and captive.You call that treating you well, Clara?”
She laughs and flashes me a slight smile.“Context matters a whole lot there, Sebastian.Despite all that, I don’t think I’ve felt happier in my whole life.”
Holding her tight, I take a deep sigh.
I don’t think I’ve ever been happier either.
11
CLARA
Settling into my new routine proves to be pretty easy.
Sebastian doesn’t demand much of me.Lots of sex, yes, but that isn’t some great sacrifice on my part.I enjoy every moment of it.
I can sit back and breathe for a change.I don’t have to worry about being thrown out in the street, I actually have money in my bank account, and I don’t feel the crushing need to go and do something productive at all times.
I can veg out in front of a TV or my laptop and be guilt-free about it if I want.
This is something I can definitely get used to.
But as Sebastian has complained while explaining his situation, you can’t do nothing forever.
And I can’t shake the knowledge that all of this won’t last forever.
Maybe with the money I make for this, I can pursue something I want to do, not just a degree in something I only care about for its paycheck potential.
The question is what.
I like drawing, but do I really want to be a professional artist?Writing is nice too, but do I have it in me to be a professional?Am I really the creative type at all?
Do I like taking care of kids?Maybe I can be a teacher.Or do daycare stuff.
I honestly had no idea if I would like that.I’ve never been around kids who weren’t my own age.Debbie has a little sister, but she’s two years younger than us, so it doesn’t count.
As I continue to contemplate my future, my phone rings.I grab hold of it and slump down onto the nearby sofa.“Hey Deb, what’s going on?”
“Nothing much.Just figured I’d feed you a little update since you’re living the high life and might be out of touch with us little people now.”
I shake my head.“I’m still in the same ratty t-shirt and sweatpants I’ve always been in.”
“I know you are.And I know you’re still you, Clara.It doesn’t mean I’m not going to give you shit about it.”
I did hope it’d remain light teasing.I value Deb’s friendship greatly.“So what’s the news?”
