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“But nothing,” he cuts me off. “Now that I've got you, I’m not lettin’ go. Told you this earlier. I don't know how else I can say it that'll get you to listen. Trust, Thea. You've gotta learn to trust me.”
“I do trust you.”
He shakes his head. “Nah, you don't. You never have, not really.”
I rear back. “What does that mean?”
“Nothing, princess. It ain't important. Let's just go.”
He turns to walk to the door, but I tug on the sleeve of his jacket to stop him. We can't leave like this. I know it isn't an argument, not exactly, but the air between us is suddenly tense and thick with words unsaid. This isn't how I wanted the night to begin and I can't help the sinking feeling churning in my gut that I'm at fault for it.
“Tell me,” I plead.
He blows out a long breath, resigning himself. “All that shit that happened, with the agent and what your dad said about me not wanting you anymore because of it?” He waits for my nod before continuing, “I kinda wish you'd had enough trust in me to know all that was bullshit.”
My face pales. Dread, guilt and confusion clash together in my stomach. “You didn't tell me that's how you felt.”
“Nah, 'cause I get it. He made you believe some really fucked-up shit. It’s no wonder you didn't come home. But it's not about that, not really. It's just, now that we're older and wiser and whatever, maybe you can start having a bit of faith in me? Maybe you can listen,reallylisten, when I say that you're it for me. You're my girl, Thea baby. You've always been my girl and always fuckin’ will. Understand?”
A single nod is my response.
“Do you, though?” he presses.
Looking up at him through my lashes, I chew at my bottom lip. “I'll work on it.”
He grins, wrapping his arms around me to pull me into his chest. Resting his chin on top of my head, he says, “That's all I can ask.”
We take a few long moments standing just like that, his hands on my back and my cheek resting over his heart. And though I've been looking forward to this event for months, I wish we could stay here like this all night.
“You ready to do this thing?” Cole asks finally, drawing away to look at me.
“Let's do this.”
He offers me his elbow, but instead of taking it, I pull the tie from around his neck and toss it across the floor. At his bewilderment, I tell him, “You don’t look like you with a tie.”
Then, together we make our way down to the lobby where a car is already waiting. And though I want so badly to do as he asks, to trust in him, to have faith in his commitment to me, I can't shake the anxiety that being together isn't going to be as simple as it's been so far.
Because there's something deep in my gut that's emitting warning signals that, despite all we've already been through together, we haven't seen the worst of it yet.
Something's coming.
I just don't know what it is.
The black towncar rolls to a stop outside the entrance of the Marriot Marquis on West 46th and Broadway, otherwise known as Times Square. I know this because I've been staring through the gap in the front seats at the navigation system on the dash, trying to put names to the places I've only ever seen on TV. Up until this trip, I've never even left the state of Oklahoma, let alone memorized the names of every street in Manhattan.
Truthfully, the city intimidates the fuck out of me. The gray concrete, yellow cabs and high rises are so unlike the sprawling fields and pine trees of Tupelo. I don't hate it, but I don't love it either. My heart is one of a small-town boy. And maybe, if I let myself be honest, I might be a little out of my depth.
Not that I'd ever tell Thea that.
She doesn't need more reasons to think that I'm going to cut and run the moment shit starts to get real. She already looks at me like she's terrified something's going to rip us apart again and all I want to do is shake her and make her see that if anyone's gonna fuck up what we've got, it ain't going to be me.
“Ready?” she asks, squeezing my hand.
For a moment, I hesitate. Cameras are already flashing outside, lighting up the famous faces I've seen climbing out of their own expensive cars and making their way into the building. I've never struggled with confidence before, but I'm hit with an unexpected bolt of self-doubt.
Swallowing hard, I nod and Thea signals to the chauffeur that we're ready.
“It's not a red-carpet event, so just keep your eyes down, walk fast and don't let go of my hand, okay?” she says with a reassuring smile, but I don't have time to respond because the door is opening and the lenses of a hundred or so cameras swing in our direction.
