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He was a civilised man, she thought feverishly. She believed what he’d said about never forcing himself on a woman. But perhaps no other woman had made him quite as angry as she’d done.
She had a bath, and put on a simple black crepe dress with a gold chain belt before going downstairs. Her mirror told her that, although pale, she looked much as usual. There were no outer signs of the trauma she’d gone through.
Except I no longer have virginal eyes, she thought wryly.
But the calm, rational confrontation she’d envisaged was not to be. A ruffled Mrs Priddy told her that Dr Templeton had gone out, giving no indication when he intended to return.
Amanda picked at a solitary dinner, then retired to the drawing-room to drink her way through a pot of black coffee.
She cast a glance at the carriage clock. It was getting incredibly late. Mrs Priddy had been in to clear the coffee away, and wish her goodnight. She supposed she should go to bed, but she wanted to see Malory and make some kind of peace with him first. Now, it occured to her for the first time that he might not be coming home that night.
Even as her mind recoiled from the implications of that, the door opened, and he walked in.
Dry-mouthed, she said, ‘Hello. You—you’ve missed dinner…’
‘I’ve eaten, thank you.‘ He sat down on the sofa opposite.
‘Oh. Well, would you like a cup of coffee—or a drink?’ She sounded like a hostess with an awkward guest, she thought with a pang.
He said politely, after a pause, ‘A whisky, perhaps,’ adding drily, ’The usual anodyne.‘
She poured it for him, her hand shaking a little. She wished she’d been able to face him hours ago. As it was, she’d had the entire evening for her nervousness and embarrassment to build up.
She handed him his drink, and resumed her seat. Jerkily, she said, ‘Malory, about this afternoon— I’m sorry,’
‘So am I,’ he said coolly. ‘Let’s consider the matter closed, shall we?’
‘But we can’t,’ Amanda protested. ‘I said some awful things to you.’
‘I’ll survive.’
‘Yes, but—I shouldn’t have criticised you—in that way…’
He smiled without humour. ‘Advice to young wives?’ he enquired ironically. ‘Always praise your husband’s performance in bed, however inept it may be? What agony column did that gem come from?’
She flushed. Nothing about this conversation was going as she intended. ‘It didn’t. But I want you to know I’m deeply ashamed about—everything. It should never have happened.’
He drank some of the whisky. ‘As a matter of interest, why did it happen?’
‘I—I don’t understand…’
He sighed shortly. ‘Yes, you do, Amanda. Why did you come to me as you did—offer yourself?’
She bent her head. ‘I don’t know,’ she admitted in a muffled voice. ‘I suppose I just wanted to know…’
‘What sex was like?’ He sounded faintly amused. ‘Well, I’m glad I was able to satisfy your curiosity, if nothing else.’
She moved her shoulders uncomfortably. ‘Don’t. It—it wasn’t your fault.’
‘I’ve no intention of evading my share of the blame.’ His voice was almost bored. ‘I know quite well you weren’t sufficiently aroused.’ He shrugged. ‘I was an impatient idiot.’ He paused. ‘Of course, if I’d had the least idea I was going to be seduced, I’d have contrived to come back from the conference slightly less tired and on edge.’
She swallowed. ‘Why did you come back so early?’
‘The last speaker went down with some twenty-four-hour virus and cancelled.’
‘Oh.’ She assimilated that, wondering what she’d been expecting him to say. That he’d been missing her so desperately, he couldn’t stay away for a moment longer? Fat chance, under the circumstances, she thought in self-derision. ‘Was—was it an interesting conference?’
‘No.’ He drank the remainder of the whisky and put down the tumbler. There was a purposefulness about the movement which alarmed her.
She said quickly, ‘Well, if I can’t get you any supper, I think I’ll go up…’
‘Not yet,’ he said evenly. ‘Come here, Amanda.’ He patted the cushion beside him.
A muscle worked convulsively in her throat. ‘I— I don’t want.. ’
‘But I do.’ His eyes met her pleading gaze, held it. ‘Don’t make me fetch you.’
He spoke gently enough, but she didn’t argue any more. Mutely, she crossed the space between them, and sat down beside him.
