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“Here we go,” Dr. Moore says and inserts the probe. I hold my breath. I think Madelena is holding hers too. But in an instant, that racing heartbeat fills the room. Madelena’s exhale matches my own. When I dip my head into her neck, she wraps a hand around it and holds me to herself because the weight of this, and the relief, they’re almost unbearable. And I’m so fucking grateful.
“She’s okay,” Madelena tells me. “She’s okay.” She’s comforting me for a change.
“She?” Dr. Moore says, trying to lighten the mood.
I raise my head and my eyebrows. Madelena turns to Dr. Moore and shrugs. “It’s just a feeling.”
The doctor smiles too. “Well, you can find out in a few more weeks if you want that.” She puts the probe away and removes her gloves.
Madelena touches my face and I force a smile, but she sees the effort it takes me. Because this isn’t over.
“Do you need a referral for a good doctor nearby?” Dr. Moore asks.
“Yes, actually,” I say, standing. Because I don’t trust anyone in Avarice.
“I’ll get you a card.” She looks at both of us, smiles, then leaves.
Madelena turns to me. “Caius?”
“Caius will never come near you again.”
I know she wants to ask what this means, but I help her up, help her get dressed in the awful clothes Father Michael provided.
“Let’s go home. I’ll have the doctor come to see you there.”
She nods and, after taking the card from Dr. Moore, we walk out into the lot. Madelena takes in the collection of soldiers. I sent twice the number and a cleaner to Hells Bells. Having dead cops involved is going to complicate things, but between my connections and Father Michael’s, we’ll figure it out.
The fact that Val is gone hits me as I help her into the SUV, but I set the thought aside for now. It’s not yet time to mourn the dead. It will come, but not yet.
“What happened? What was that call?” Madelena asks as I climb into the driver’s side, and we head home.
“Nothing.”
“It’s not nothing.”
I keep my eyes on the road and feel hers burn into me. She has questions, but I’m not ready to answer them just yet.
“Santos.” She touches my hand and I turn to her. “I almost died today. We almost lost the baby. Maybe I almost lost you. Please talk to me. No secrets.”
I grit my teeth, but she’s right. “My mother. This all started with her years ago. More than a decade ago.”
“Your mother?”
“And my brother. To a different extent. But guilty is guilty.”
“What was the call?”
“She’s gone.”
“Gone?”
I nod, draw a deep breath in and exhale it out. “I’ll go to Augustine’s later. Figure it out.” We stop at a traffic light, and I turn to her, touch her cheek. “Let me take care of you first.” I shake my head, pull her to me, and kiss her forehead. “I thought I lost you.”
“You didn’t.” A tear rolls down her cheek. “I’m here. We’re both here.”
I nod.
“Your brother. Are you going to be okay?”
