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She looks up at me. I draw her to her feet and lead her up to the bedroom. I need her to not worry. To not ask questions I don’t want to answer just yet.
I simply need to be close to her because like this place, she heals.
* * *
We spenda full week at the cottage. I intended on one night but can’t bring myself to leave, can’t get enough of seeing Madelena as she is here. Soft, relaxed, herself. It’s one week where, after leaving Caius and Odin messages to let them know we’re out of town, Madelena and I walk along the beach, eat too many cinnamon rolls, and spend the nights making love in front of the fire. It’s easy, simple. It’s a life that can’t ever be mine, not outside of this little cottage, this little forgotten town.
On the morning of the eighth day, the mood palpably different than the prior days, we pack our single duffel into the car and reluctantly say goodbye to Father Michael. I feel better than I have in a long time as I hug my old friend and savior. But I can’t keep the sense of dread from creeping in as I climb into the SUV, and we begin the drive back to Avarice. Back to reality.
“You like it here?” I ask her.
“I love it here. I don’t want to leave, actually.”
“We’ll come back. It’s our secret place. No one knows about it. Hells Bells is just for us, just you and me, okay?”
She studies my face. Does she hear what I’m not saying? She nods.
As soon as we’re about twenty minutes out of town and within reach of a cell tower, the barrage of text messages and emails sets my phone on fire. The lack of connectivity is one of the things that has always made Hells Bells a haven for me, but when reality hits, it hits hard.
After glancing at a few texts from Caius asking where I am and how long I plan to be MIA, I ignore all the messages. I send a quick text to Val telling him our ETA, then tuck the phone into my pocket.
“You know, we don’t have to go back,” Madelena says.
I glance at her. “I think we do. Besides, I’m sure your brother will want to see you today. Happy birthday, by the way.” I smile at her. She attempts a smile. “And of course there’s the meeting with your uncle’s lawyer.”
“I’m sure we can do that another day.” She turns away.
I glance at the rearview mirror. The sign welcoming visitors to Hells Bells has barely faded into the background, and already, everything feels different.
“I’m nervous.” She keeps her gaze out the side window.
I squeeze her knee. “I’ll be there with you. And you don’t have to do anything but sign the paperwork and take the key. That’s all.”
She faces me and she’s biting the inside of her cheek. “I want to see it.”
“The house?”
She nods.
“You sure?”
“I think I should. And I know Odin wants to, too. We had happy memories there. It’s just… they’re clouded over, you know?”
“You don’t have to go today. I’ll take you when you’re ready.”
“I don’t know that I’ll ever be ready to go into the house where he was murdered. I just have to do it.”
Her words have me tightening my grip on the steering wheel. She doesn’t deserve this.
Her phone dings with a text. She reads it and a small smile appears on her face. “Do you mind if I have lunch with my brother? Except for the last two years, we used to do that on our birthdays. Just the two of us.”
The last two years when I’ve kept her locked away.
“I didn’t mean…” she starts as if reading my thoughts.
“It’s all right.” I’ve had her all to myself for a week. I can let her have her lunch. “Where?”
“He made a reservation at Trattoria Maria. It’s in the center of town.” I check my watch. “He’ll take me to the lawyer’s office afterwards.”
