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“I never said you were a virgin,” Dean said, his tone low and soothing. That was one of the things she liked best about him. In all the time she’d spent with him, even when he’d been stern with her, he’d never once raised his voice. It was wonderful.
“What are the other rules?” She didn’t want to dwell too much on her experience, or lack thereof. If he found out she’d only been with two men in her whole life, he’d probably call the whole thing off.
“You are also to use your safeword if you are in any kind of distress, including emotional or mental. The last thing I want is to send you into a panic attack in the middle of a spanking.”
“Okay. Sure.” Now that one might be a little more difficult. She almost always felt as though she were in a state of ‘emotional distress’, so how was she supposed to know when it was bad enough to use her safeword?
“MaryAnn, if you’re not going to take this seriously, then I am not going to spank you.”
“I am taking it seriously!” She just managed to resist the urge to roll her eyes. “I promise I will use my safeword if I need to.”
Eyes narrowed, he studied her face for what felt like an eternity before giving a single nod of his head. “All right. Last rule. Rule Ten. And this is the most important rule of all.”
Butterflies danced in her stomach. “What is it?”
“You have the right to withdraw your consent completely and wholly at any time. Even if you’ve already agreed to the punishment, even if you are already over my knee, even if your bottom is already bare and red, you can tell me you do not consent and I will respect your decision. Your stay here is in no way contingent on you submitting to my discipline. I won’t be mad, I won’t yell, I won’t make you feel bad for changing your mind, and that’s a promise. Understood?”
A lovely sort of warmth spread throughout her abdomen, down all her limbs to her fingers and toes. Nobody in her life had ever made a promise like that, and despite it all, she trusted him to keep it. “Yes, Sir.”
“Good. Now, for this first time, I’m going to spank you over your jeans. But the next time you break a rule, unless you withdraw your consent, I will spank you on your bare bottom.”
That was, she had to admit, a bit of a relief. As curious as she was about being spanked, she wasn’t eager to have him staring at her untrimmed lady bits. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome. Now, do you have any questions before we begin?”
“No. No questions.”
“All right.” He didn’t move for so long, she thought he’d changed his mind before he abruptly stood and held out a hand. “Come with me.”
Allowing herself to be led back to the couch and pulled down over his lap, she did her best to keep the panic at bay as questions and doubts flooded her brain. Dean felt like someone she could trust, but then again, so had Nate.
Obviously, her ability to judge someone’s character was majorly skewed.
But Bryant wouldn’t have left her alone with Dean if he didn’t trust him, and Bryant was one of the smartest people she knew. So, if Bryant trusted him, she could, too.
Right?
“Sweetheart, I’m not going to spank you while your mind is in a whole other galaxy.”
Dean’s amused tone distracted her from the whirlwind in her mind, even if the questions and doubts didn’t entirely disappear. “I’m sorry.”
“Not necessary. But that’s double the count for breaking Rule Two.”
Well, shit. “Whoops.”
“Whoops is right. It’s a count of twenty for putting yourself down, and an extra twenty for apologizing when you didn’t do anything wrong.”
“Do I need to count out loud or anything?”
“No, sweetheart. I’ll keep count for you. Ready?”
The constant buzz of noise in her brain had grown almost deafening, but she managed to nod. “Yes.”
She wasn’t sure what she’d been expecting. Even with all her mother’s verbal abuse, she’d rarely laid a hand on MaryAnn, so she had no real reference point for how much it should hurt. In her imagination, a spanking was excruciatingly painful, almost impossible to endure.
The reality, however, was much different. It hurt, it really did, but it was nowhere near the overwhelming pain she’d sometimes read about in her books.
And yet, by the fifth swat, an ache had settled in her chest and tears were filling her eyes. By number ten, her entire backside felt warm and stingy and the tears were falling freely down her cheeks. Not because of the pain; she’d been through a hell of a lot worse without shedding a single tear. Like the time she’d broken her arm falling out of that tree in her backyard.
