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He’s not only a different person, but he has a family. I glance at Derek who earlier acted more like a lover than a friend. My throat tightens as I manage to ask, “Are you two lovers?”
Derek stays quiet for a few moments, then lifts one eyebrow and smiles slightly. “Finn and me?” He lets out a laugh. “We’re not together. He’s emotionally unavailable and also in a—”
“In a relationship,” I finish for him. “Which makes it impossible for you to make a move because she probably won’t share.”
His face falls. I can see the pain shimmering in his eyes.
His lips twitch downward, and his eyes glisten with unshed tears. He lifts the wineglass to his mouth, but it trembles in his hand. With a single, quick nod he says, “The story of my life. I’m always a second-choice or… I make bad decisions when it comes to relationships.”
He is right, and his words painfully echo my own thoughts. We are to each other what some would call right person, wrong time.
If I had met him now that I know Archer will never be back with me. We could’ve…
But it’s too late—it’s over.
It’s over even though it never started.
I feel the weight of what we lost crushing my chest. I try to take a deep breath, but it feels like there’s a knot in my throat. I want to run away, escape from this house, my past—escape from who I was supposed to be and become someone else.
I can’t turn back the clock and change the past. I’m filled with a sense of ongoing sadness as I ask him, “When do you think I can go home?” My voice is barely above a whisper and my heart aches with the hope that he might send me tonight so I could be done with them.
What I’ll do after is an enigma. I have to grieve Archer and learn to live without Derek.
Finn steps out of the shadows and into the courtyard, a look of confusion on his face. “Why would you want to leave?”
“I don’t belong here,” I mutter, eyes darting between him and Derek.
“You’re not going anywhere until I say so,” Finn says, his voice rising with each word. I clench my jaw, refusing to back down from his challenge.
“I don’t take orders from anyone,” I argue with a voice that’s now more determined.
“You’ll stay here for as long as I see fit,” Finn yells, the air between us crackling with electricity.
I shift my gaze to Derek. His face is filled with compassion, yet he remains silent. “Can you take me home, please?” I ask him in a whisper.
Derek shakes his head once. “As long as your family is off the grid, you’re safer with us,” he says in a calm voice.
I glance from Derek to Finn, confusion clouding my face. “Why would you care where I am?” I ask softly, my voice barely audible. “It’s not like you guys are going to stick around. I’ll be alone by the end of the night or early tomorrow.”
“We’ll be here.” Finn’s expression guts me. He’s concerned, and there’s a tenderness in his eyes that reminds me of Archer.
My Archer.
It’s as if he wants to bear the pain I carry, to make things better for me in some way. We stare at each other for a long time before he clears his throat and says, “At least until Seth can join us so we can start the next phase of the operation.”
“Seth is going to work for you?” I ask, surprised and concerned. “Why? Is Uncle Mason okay?”
“It seems like we have a common enemy.” Finn’s voice is filled with determination as he speaks, “It’s sensible to join forces.”
“What about Teddy?” I ask, my heart pounding in my chest. “Have you found her yet?”
Finn gives me a gentle smile. “My men might’ve found her. If everything goes as planned, I might bring her so she can be with you while you recover.”
I sigh with relief. I find myself nodding in agreement at the prospect of staying longer in this house, even though I don’t like the idea of being held captive.
“Listen, I’m not doing this to make your life miserable,” Finn speaks with a gentle voice. “But for some reason I can’t explain, I care for your well-being, and so does Derek.”
And how I wish that they cared in a different way, my heart aches with longing and disappointment. But this is what life is serving me, and I’ll have to learn to make something good out of this fucked-up situation.
