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That got people chuckling.
I didn’t need cheap jokes at my expense.
I leaned down toward the woman again.
“Tell me your name, love,” I said. “Help me end this ridiculous scene.”
She nodded. “Hazel.”
“Like the color of someone’s eyes?”
She looked at me. “Yes.”
I looked at her eyes. “Your eyes aren’t hazel though.”
“Are they supposed to be?”
“Oh, do you see what I see here?” Ellen asked. “Anyone else see some sparks flying right now?”
Great. More cheers.
Half-drunk rich people loving the sight of this.
Like they’re watching a live reality television show.
That’s when I knew Hazel and I needed to get off the stage.
“So now the next question,” Ellen said. “The obvious question. When is the big date?”
She asked as though I had this stuff planned out.
She was good on the microphone.
She could have made a career as a paparazzi.
That’s when I decided to have my voice heard.
I grabbed for Ellen’s hand and the microphone.
“We’re going to have a drink and get to know each other first,” I said. My voice boomed through the speakers. Shaking the room like an earthquake. “Then we’ll talk about the date.”
“Try it before you buy it, Atlas!”
That was Rome yelling to me.
Then came some whistles.
I wanted this thing to end and end right now.
So I played the game for a few seconds.
Pointing. Nodding. Winking.
Then I turned, taking Hazel with me.
I leaned toward her one more time. “We have to get out of here, love. There’s a bar down the street. Want to make a run for it with me?”
“Please,” Hazel said.
