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That sounds about right. Neither of them were ever going to be prize human beings, from what I remember of them. Not that it’s a bad thing. I’m certainly not an upstanding member of the community, either.

“Anyone back home going to miss them?” I ask.

Simon shrugs. “Both of them still have living parents, and Terry has a trophy fiancé. But as everyone knows, Mexico can be a very dangerous place if you’re not paying attention to your surroundings.”

That’s for sure, and thank fuck we haven’t had to deal with the cartels down there. I know in the far distant past Lucifer’s father had dealings with them. But those ties were cut during what we call the Transition, when Lucifer took over the business for his father.

“This friend,” I ask, “he going to keep this quiet if two assholes come storming into wherever and take two problems away?”

Smirking, Simon points to the overhead compartment above him. “I’m betting not a single person will say a thing to us.”

The hairs on the back of my neck stand on end.

And I wonder if I should have tried to become an honest citizen after I got out of the Legion.

Maybe I could have been a grocery store manager or something…

The rest of the flight goes by quickly as we settle into our seats and begin our weapon checks.

Simon is just as efficient in his cleaning and checking of his weapons as he is with everything else in his life. Each weapon is immaculately oiled to perfection, no rust and no rattle.

My weapons are in nearly the same condition, but I do notice a couple nicks and dings on the M4 that could have been taken care of.

Fuck it.

My weapons will work perfectly when needed, just like my dick.

“You know Beth is more than likely on the phone with Meredith by now,” I say, and look down at my old wristwatch.

Sighing, Simon nods. “I’m sure they are. Thankfully they both have encrypted phones.”

I smirk at him. “Don’t need another oopsie, I guess.”

He smiles. “If there was and we got another ranking politician out of it, I wouldn’t mind one bit. But I don’t see that happening any time soon.”

“Me either.” I lean back. “How’s the pardon coming for the doctor?”

“Slowly. The governor needs to lie low for this election cycle, so he’s trying to do it when the press has some other big topic to occupy them.”

“We could always start a war with Mexico while we’re down here,” I suggest.

“Please don’t joke about that.” Simon chuckles. “You haven’t even seen your surprise yet.”

Looking up to the overhead compartment, I ask, “Can I look at it now?”

He stands from his chair. “Of course.”

Standing up, I open the overhead compartment and frown at the two green bulletproof vests.. Pulling one of them down, I look at what’s on the front and just about shit myself.

“Fucking hell, DEA vests?” I lift it up to get at good view of the patch and the badge on it. “This fucker looks like the real thing.”

“That’s because they are,” he says with a smirk. “Both of them. So, like I said, let’s try not to start an international incident.”

I smile as I pull the vest over my head and strap it tight around my waist. “Two American DEA agents walking into a vacation resort is going to cause a commotion.”

“Yes, but not as much as two armed men without DEA on their chests. This has an air of validity.”

“True.” I look down at my clothes and everything is making a lot more sense now. “You want us to look like typical grungy DEA thugs. We snatch a couple of guys and all the pearl-clutchers will be thankful we took the bad druggies away.”

Simon straps his own vest on. “Exactly.”

The white panel van we’re riding in the back of throws us all over the place. It feels like we’re going to hit every single fucking pothole and rut possible.

“Fucking dicks,” I grumble as I pull myself back into my seat. “This shit’s gotta be intentional.”

“As much as I would love to agree with you, I’ve looked at the maps going into this place,” Simon growls from across me. “While the resort is quite nice, the roads around it are typical for this part of the country.”

I grunt as we slam down and then back up hard enough to cause my head to hit the roof of the van. “If this lasts much longer, I’m going to have a kidney stone shaken loose.”

“I’ve actually had one of those,” Simon growls.

“Yeah? They say it’s like giving birth.”

Simon winces at what must be a memory. “Meredith didn’t see it that way while I was coaching her through Lamaze class.”

“You two doing good?” I ask.

Simon looks at me, and I can tell he’s trying to decide exactly how he’s going to answer me. “Yes, though if she continues to threaten my cock every time I look at her… I’m not sure Matthew will be too happy with me.”

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