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Is it…me?
“Did I do something?” I ask, racking my brain. I go through our day—we woke up and my cock was hard, so I kissed Tabitha and sucked on her breasts while I rubbed her clit and made her come. Then, we went into the shower together and she jerked me off and then we had breakfast after the shower. She’d kissed me goodbye and told me to hurry home because the cattle were going to be born and then I went to work. The job site was more dam repairs (and has been for two weeks now) so I’m not sure if I missed something there. Does she need me to be more ambitious? “Am I not enough for you?”
Tabitha swipes at her eyes. “You’re disappointed in me.”
“I am?”
“You are, because I have really bad news.”
Oh kef. She’s dumping me. She’s decided she doesn’t want to be with a praxiian—or anyone—and wants me to move out. I try to brace myself against the pain of the realization that she doesn’t want me, but it sweeps through me like wildfire, leaving nothing but ash behind. I feel numb. Miserable and numb. “What is it?”
“I can’t do this,” she says and bursts into fresh tears.
Her weeping is killing me. I try to put an arm around her and when she lets me, I hold her close. “I never meant to pressure you. If you want me to leave you alone, I will.” I’m trying to be understanding, but kef it all, I just want to grab her and kiss her until she changes her mind about me. I know I’m not a great catch—I’m not excessively educated like the mesakkah, or from a fierce gladiator caste. I’m just a welder in love with a human female. “Whatever I did to hurt you, I never meant it, Tabitha. Please know that.”
“The cattle,” she chokes. “I can’t kill them.”
I pause, stroking her hair back from her face, because I’m confused. I’m talking about how I never meant to hurt her and she’s talking about cattle? I’m not certain we’re in the same star-lane here. “I’m confused, Tabitha. What about the cattle?”
“You’re going to think I’m stupid, but I can’t kill them. Don’t ask me to!”
“I…would never? They’re your cattle. You can dress them up and give them names for all I care. I just want you happy.” I brush my fingers over her wet cheek. “Is this why you’re crying?”
“Because you’re going to think I’m crazy and then you’ll hate me and things are too perfect.” She sniffs hard, burying her face against my neck. “But I can’t be someone I’m not.”
I’m still confused, but she’s clinging to me, so I’m hopeful that I’m not the one she wants to get rid of. “You think I’m going to assume that you’re crazy because you won’t kill your cattle?” At her nod, I can’t resist a bit of teasing. “You don’t think the weapons and pit traps made me question your sanity, but the cattle will?”
She draws back and gives me a questioning look.
“Tabitha,” I say gently. “You’ve been through things I can’t even imagine. If that’s made you a bit eccentric, I don’t care. Keep your cattle. Fill the house with weapons. Just be happy. Just be you. That’s all that I want from our relationship.” I wipe her tears again. “I’m not worth crying over.”
Tabitha gives my chest a little push. “Maybe I think you are.”
I grin. “All right.”
“Don’t devalue yourself.” She gives me another nudge on my chest, and I obediently lean back, only for her to crawl over me, a predatory expression on her face. “If I want to cry over you, I will.”
“Very well.”
“And if I want to keep the cattle, I will.” Her voice is growing with confidence. She swings a leg over my hips, straddling me, and if we weren’t surrounded by a bunch of mooing animals, I might find this moment incredibly sexy.
“They’re your cattle,” I say agreeably. “Do with them as you like.”
“And you’ll like it.”
“I’ll keffing love it because it makes you happy.” Sure, there’s a beast sniffing at my head, but I ignore it.
She puts a hand on my chest, gazing down at me. “I’m scared,” she says in a suddenly vulnerable voice. “I think I’m trying to pick a fight because I like you too much.”
“You can’t fight with me. I agree with everything you’re saying.” I put a hand on her hip and squeeze affectionately, trying to ignore the animal that’s nibbling on my mane. “But I understand being afraid of things going too well. Just don’t cry before you talk to me, all right?”
She nods, biting her lip.
“Can I make one request?” I say, and when she raises an eyebrow at me, I continue. “I’m all for keeping the cattle, but do they have to be in the living room?”
