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I clench my jaw, realizing exactly where my fantasies have headed and how ridiculous this is. I’m standing out in the hallway of a five-star hotel, rapidly getting a throbbing erection all over again while imagining the girl I abducted from a train station earlier undressing for a bath, like some inexperienced virgin getting horny over a lingerie catalogue. I force myself to stride away from the door and quickly head down the hall towards the elevator, adjusting myself as I go and pushing every possible thought of how Lidiya would look naked out of my mind.
I’m not going to think about whether her breasts are small or full, if her waist is narrow beneath that sweater or how her hips curve. I’m not going to think about how she felt up against that door, how soft she was or how good it felt when she squirmed against me—
Fuck.I grit my teeth as I step into the elevator, hoping no one joins me and that I can manage to wrestle my cock under control before stepping out into the lobby. That’s all I need—to look like I can’t control myself while in one of the nicest establishments in Moscow.
What I need is a woman. Any woman, really, so long as she’s willing. Just somewhere to put my aching cock, so that I can focus on the job ahead, and stop thinking about Lidiya in entirely inappropriate ways. I can’t even easily jerk off any longer—since Lidiya is confined to my hotel room for the time being, and there’s a chance she’d hear me, even in the shower. The last thing I need is to make her even more uncomfortable, and put the chances of her cooperating in danger—especially now that I’ve gotten her to agree, for now at least.
By now, she’s probably in the bath.She might have even found some of those fancy bath products they’d lined it with, the oils that always smell like flowers. The thought of her sinking into the steaming water, her skin slick with it, her blonde hair floating around her is enough to send another pulse of desire through me, making me nearly groan aloud with frustration.
What the hell is wrong with me?I’m no stranger to desire, lust even, but no one has gotten this under my skin in recent memory. I’m not sure any woman has, ever. I don’t stew and fantasize over women, because there’s always one within easy reach, if I want her. I’ve never had trouble finding company, if I want it.
But I can’t escape the lingering feeling that it isn’t company I want. It’sLidiya. And the harder I try to push the image of her flushed, naked skin slick with bathwater out of my head, the more out of control my hard-on becomes. I grit my teeth against the throb that seems to have taken up residence in my very veins as I rub my hand against the front of my jeans, trying to ease the ache before the elevator hits the lobby floor–which comes all too quickly.
Just like I might, if I saw her naked and wet right now.
Fuck this.I stride out of the elevator, walking as quickly as I can to the nearest men’s room. It’s almost uncomfortable to walk by this point, and to my relief, the lobby is nearly empty. I push my way into the black and marble men’s room, equally grateful that it seems to be empty, and stride into the furthest stall from the door.
I can’t fucking believe what I’m doing, even as I yank my zipper down, feverishly reaching for my aching cock that feels like it’s been at least half-aroused for the better part of the last few hours. I don’t think I’ve ever done this before, ever jerked off in a fuckingbathroom stalllike someone without a decent hotel room or apartment to go back to, even if he can’t seal the deal with a girl. But there’s nowhere else for me to go right now, and those few hours trapped in the room with Lidiya have me so desperate for a release that I’m past all logical thought.
I want to think of anything but her while I stroke it. The woman I fucked a couple of weeks ago, some Russian supermodel, my favorite actresses,anythingexcept the one woman in the fucking world right now that I need to keep my hands off of, and yet I can’t. All I can see is her flushed, angry face looking defiantly up at me as I pinned her up against the door. All I can imagine is her arched against me, trying to squirm out of my grasp, how right now she’s naked in my hotel room. All I’d have to do is go upstairs, and she’d be there, bare and vulnerable and entirely under my power.
The men I work with, so many of them, wouldn’t have the slightest compunction about doing exactly that. They’d promise her things in exchange for her body, or worse yet, they’d simply take it. But I can’t do that—I’ve never been that kind of man, and I can’t imagine doing it to Lidiya most of all.
There’s two separate emotions warring within me right now—an almost desperate lust for her that makes no fucking sense and is completely fucking inappropriate, and a need to protect her that feels almost compulsive, and makes equally little sense. It’s only the latter, aside from my own personal moral code, that keeps me from getting back on that elevator, dragging her out of the bath, and bending her over the counter while I—
Fuck. Fuck, fuck—I bite back a groan as my cock throbs in my hand, my fist flying over the straining flesh as I picture exactly that–Lidiya bent over the bathroom counter with her ass in the air, her back arched, looking defiantly back at me as I thrust myself into her. I wouldn’t bother to wait for her to dry off, I’d watch her dripping on the counter, every inch of her as wet as her pussy would be, tight and clenching around me. I imagine sliding my fingers between her folds, rubbing and pinching her tiny, hard clit to ensure that she came too, so that I could feel the quivering of her thighs against mine just before I rammed every inch of my hard cock so deeply into her pussy that she’d never fucking forget what it felt like to be fucked by Levin Volkov—
“Bladya!”I curse under my breath as my cock swells in my fist, my hand gripping the top of the wall beside me to steady myself as my thighs tense and I jerk forward, biting back the groans of pleasure as my cock erupts with the relief that I so badly needed. I want more than anything to be buried inside of her right now, to be filling her up with my hot cum instead of shooting it out into the toilet, but at this precise moment the relief of the orgasm is so great that I almost don’t care.
I keep stroking it all the way through, feeling it swell and throb in my fist as I squeeze every last drop out as the shudders ripple through me, and when I’m finally done I sag against the wall with a sigh of relief that feels as if it goes all the way down to my soul.
And then, of course, the clarity comes like a truck slamming into me.
What the fuck are you doing?
This is beneath me.Sheshould be beneath me, and not in the way I was just imagining. I don’t need to fantasize about and fuck the women we use to trap our marks. I’m a fucking idiot for letting her get under my skin, and all I can do is hope that no one saw me rushing in here in that state or heard me, because it’s fucking embarrassing.
I shove my cock back into my pants, gritting my teeth as I zip up.I need to get fucking laid, and soon, because it’s clear that I’m losing my goddamn mind.
My phone vibrates in my pocket, startling me as I step out of the stall. I barely have a chance to wash my hands before it starts up again, this time the insistent vibration of someone calling me, and I dig it out of my pocket as I walk out into the lobby.
“Hello?” I turn in the direction of the bar. I need a stiff drink, maybe two. In fact, if I didn’t have Lidiya upstairs and a job to do, I’d probably get roaring drunk, just to scrub the memory of what I’ve just done clear out of my head.
“Volkov. Is this a bad time?”
Yes, is what I want to say. Vladimir, my boss, is absolutely the last person I want to talk to right now. But of course I can’t say that, because if he’s calling me, that means there’s a reason he wants to talk.
I just hope it’s not a bad one.
“Not at all,” I tell him smoothly, sinking down into one of the plush lobby chairs and looking longingly towards the bar. That drink is feeling further and further away by the moment.
“I haven’t heard from you since you left for the station this morning.” Vladimir’s voice is cool and even, not betraying anything he might be thinking in the slightest. “Is everything alright?”
“We’re fine. No issues here.” I leave out the struggle to convince Lidiya—he doesn’t need to know, and at any rate, I doubt he expected the conversation to go perfectly smoothly. The outcome is what’s important.
“The girl has agreed to the arrangement with Grisha?”
“Yes. There was a slight snag, but—” I hesitate, thinking of how to explain it. “I’ve come to terms with her.”
