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“Has he told his mother about me yet?” I ask bluntly.
Konstantin squirms in his seat. “Um…”
“That’s answer enough,” I sigh. “I had no idea I was such an embarrassment. We’re married, and he won’t even tell his mother about me.”
“He isn’t embarrassed of you,” he says gently. “I think it’s just easier for him to compartmentalize.”
I don’t bother asking him to explain that. I can already tell that I’ve pushed him past his comfort zone. Still, when we arrive at Orion headquarters, Konstantin jumps out of the car like it’s about to explode.
I don’t mind. I have a board meeting to prepare for.
I head directly to the boardroom where the meeting will take place so I can get the lay of the land. Rowan is there already, placing files and water in front of each chair.
“That’s not your job,” I say to announce my arrival.
“Morning to you, too,” she says distractedly. “I know it’s not, but I need to keep busy. Are you okay?”
I grimace. “A little nervous, but—”
“No, I mean about yesterday,” she says. “Misha seemed pretty pissed.”
“Oh, right. It turned out okay. He took me home and cooked me dinner.”
“Oh,” Rowan says, raising an eyebrow. “Okay, that’s a relief. I was worried he’d be mad. I mean, he looked mad.”
“I think he was just mad at the situation. Even if he was mad at me, he would never hurt me.”
The moment the words are out of my mouth, I realize I mean them. I genuinely believe that. Somehow, I’ve given him my trust when I promised myself I’d be smarter this time.
“Good. I’m glad…” Rowan’s voice trails off.
I shove my existential crisis aside for later and redirect my focus. “What about you? Are you okay?”
She gives me a nervous smile. “Petyr Ivanov really freaks me the fuck out.”
“He’s got major creeper vibes.”
“Forget creeper vibes; he’s got major ax murderer vibes. He reminds me of one of my exes.”
I stifle a laugh. “One of your exes had ax murderer vibes?”
She shakes her head and forces a smile onto her face. “Ignore me. I shouldn’t be bringing you down with my hang ups. Today is all about your first board meeting as Head of Marketing. It’s a Paige day, not a Rowan day.”
A fresh wave of nerves washes through me. It’s still weird to hear her say that kind of thing out loud.
“You look amazing, by the way. That suit is kickass,” Rowan says.
I run my hands down the front of the jacket. “It was a gift from Misha.”
Rowan’s expression melts into a dreamy smile. “He really is good to you, isn’t he?”
“He promised me he would be,” I say softly. “I guess I’m starting to believe him.”
He’ll treat me well even if he never loves me. It’s not a bad deal, but is it enough? What if I bargained away my chance at love for the opportunity to feel secure? How can I weigh one thing against the other?
“Paige?” I look up to find Rowan staring at me. “You okay?”
I try to push away the doubt. “Of course. Just a little nervous. I never thought I’d be sitting at the head of a table like this.”
