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A team of nurses gets Paige into a hospital bed and strips her down. Simone moves between her legs, feeling for something.
“Exquisite timing,” she says, withdrawing her hand and pulling off a glove. “It looks like you made it right on time.”
Paige turns pale. “Wait—you mean they’re coming right now? Like, right now?”
Simone nods. “Yes. But don’t you worry about a thing. These babies are a good size. They’ll be small but tough. Just like their mama.”
I can see the panic on Paige’s face, and it unravels me. I’m useless here, so fucking useless. All I can do is pace up and down the ward with my hands knotted into fists, clenching my dog tags like they’ll bring miracles the way Paige’s pendant does for her.
I watch a nurse set up a tray of tools for Simone. “What the fuck are those for?” They look like torture devices. I should know.
Simone lays a hand on my arm. “Misha, you need to calm down.”
A nurse points to a recliner next to the bed. “There’s a chair in the corner for fathers when they need to—”
“Stop telling me what I need. I don’t need a fucking thing,” I snap. “Here’s what Iwant. My wife wants drugs. She doesn’t want to be in any pain. I don’t want her to be in any pain.”
Simone arches an eyebrow. “It’s childbirth, Misha. It’s going to hurt.”
“She needs some ice chips or something.” I point at one of the younger nurses. “You! Go get some ice chips.”
Paige groans through a contraction. “M-Misha… I don’t want fucking… ice chips.” She moans again and I nearly punch through their perfectly sterile wall.
“Where thefuckare the drugs?” I demand loudly.
Simone steps in front of me. She’s an entire head shorter than me, but she holds herself like someone miles taller. “It’s too late for an epidural now. The babies are coming. Paige is going to have to do this without the drugs.”
“That is fucking unacceptable. She doesn’t want—”
“Misha!”
It’s the only voice that has the power to stop me in my tracks. I turn to my wife, and she waves me over. The moment I’m close enough, she takes my hand and kisses it.
“Misha,” she says again, “I know the Bratva is your life. But right now I don’t need you to be the don. I need you to be my husband.”
All at once, the weight on my shoulder falls away. This situation is not mine to control. What happens here is up to Paige and Simone and the universe—the last of whom really owes me a blessing or two.
I take a deep breath and lean down to kiss her forehead. “I’m here with you,kiska.”
She closes her eyes and breathes through another contraction. “Tell me something nice. Something you’ve never told me before.”
I hold her hand and wrack my brain for something to say. I’ve told her she’s beautiful, she’s sexy, she’s wise, and she’s brave. I’ve told her I love her, and I do. I’ve told her I’ll fight for her, and I have. After all that, what else is there to say?
Then it occurs to me.
I lean down and whisper in my wife’s ear, “Maksim would have loved you.”
It’s the highest compliment I can give.
85
PAIGE
I’m a few minutes into motherhood and I already feel overwhelmed. How can you mother children when you yourself have never been mothered?
Then I heard them cry.
And all that worry vanished at once.
