Page 56 of Whiskey Pain


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His son is in the hands of his enemies. I can’t imagine a worse feeling.

“Noelle, what were they going to—”

“I don’t know!” she blurts. “They really didn’t give me any details. But… well, I think you’re better off looking for remains, at this point. If I had to guess, Benjamin is dead.”

The words knock the wind out of me. I double over, too sick to sit up straight. But Timofey doesn’t move. He just closes out the call and sits there, staring straight ahead, his eyes unseeing.

“Timofey,” I rasp. “I’m so sorry. I’m—I had no idea any of this would happen. I’m—”

“Pregnant. You’re pregnant, Piper. Calm down before…” He swallows and stands up. “Calm down before I lose both of my children.”

Then he walks into the bathroom and closes the door.

25

TIMOFEY

The flight is endless.

Piper spends most of it with her head against the window, pretending to sleep. I let her. It’s easier than trying to make conversation.

How can we talk about anything else when Benjamin’s fate is a dark cloud over our heads? No, not a dark cloud—a lightning storm. A hurricane.

Everything feels drenched in the hopelessness that he is gone.

That I failed him.

That I failed Emily.

The pilot announces our descent, and I turn off Airplane Mode. There are a few messages from Akim, but nothing important.

Piper stretches an arm over her head, feigning a yawn. She looks exhausted. “Are we there?”

“We’ll land in a few minutes.”

She nods and gives me a small smile. I don’t return it.

I’ve never wasted time pretending in my life. I’m not going to start now.

When the plane lands, I’m the first on my feet. I move into the aisle and make space for Piper to go ahead of me. I want eyes on her the entire time we are going through the airport.

Akim suggested a private escort to meet us on the tarmac, but that would be even more ostentatious. I don’t want to draw more attention to our arrival than necessary.

“Where are we going next?” Piper asks.

“Home.”

She looks back over her shoulder. “Both of us?”

I don’t answer. She won’t like it, but she’s too fragile now. I’ve already lost one child; I refuse to lose another before they’re even born.

I look over her head towards the few passengers greeting the attendants and shaking hands with the pilot at the front of the plane. A vaguely familiar head of gray hair stops me in my tracks.

Instinctively, I grab the back of Piper’s sweater.

“What?” she hisses. She understands immediately that something is wrong.

I shake my head. “I don’t know yet.”

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