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“We go through obstacles to grow, darling. It’s mandatory.”
“Should I stay away from forests then?” I laugh.
She doesn’t find it at all amusing. Instead, she sips on her tea and stares at the fan that’s blowing in the cool air as strong as a sturdy air conditioner unit, as strong as the one in my garage.
“Metaphors are too much for you? You strike me as bright, so there’s no need to be silly.”
I bite my lip. I can imagine someone taking Flora’s words as rude, but I can’t help but trust this woman. I ease up on my sarcasm.
“Do you have any advice for me?”
She smiles, big and wide. “Keep your curiosity and be kind to your body. Make sure you take care of your heart and understand that you can only own your feelings. Honor them, and this won’t be the last time you’re here. Everything else I have to say to you isn’t for the now because you have yet to travel through the forest. Once you experience it, it’ll make more sense to you.”
She gifts me a tiny moonstone necklace and small rose quartz to keep in my pocket. She doesn’t tell me their specific purpose or meaning but insists on me keeping them. Like her place, they smell like nature, as if she mined them and cleaned them off just for me.
“Thank you, Flora.”
“Yes, of course. Also, the universe has a bigger plan for you that lies outside this town. I like most folks that find their way out of this town. If you can’t follow the unwritten norm of this town, you will be forced to walk in the forests…like me.”
This makes me happy, and I don’t feel the need to tell her about my big-city dreams. I’m sure she can see that already, as I understand what she means by “the forest.”
I embrace Flora before I get into Mom’s car. Flora feels doughy, comforting, and soft, like freshly baked bread.
“Remember to honor your feelings and take care of your body.”
I wonder if she’s advising me to loosen up on the great sex Freddy’s been giving me. As far as I’m concerned, being with him has been good for my body. Not only do I feel more like a woman when I’m with him, I feel confident and radiate around him. It’s just fucking hot and real.
“No, not that,” she mumbles.
Instead of reacting to her comment, I take a deep breath.
I drive off wondering what kind of symbolism is connected with the forest. I could take a trip around the internet, but that’ll guarantee a little bit of everything. If anything, I can research the meaning of the crystals.
It’s probably best to trust the moment. My mom has always said that information comes to you when it’s ready. I think she used to tell me this because I’ve always been that girl who’ll ask a trillion questions with a dash of impatience on top. I never used to like it when Mom would say that, but now I kind of dig it.
Chapter 10
Freddy
ThebowlingalleyonSpring Road is still standing. The last time Braxton and I were in this place together, I was nine years old, and he was almost eighteen. Last minute as always, our impulsive foster parents bought me obnoxiously large balloons and took us to the bowling rink to celebrate my adoption.
Braxton had huge crocodile tears in his eyes that day. He was so happy for me and told me to promise to write to him when I left. I did. A couple of times. But this was the exact space I was in when I realized my life was bigger than I ever imagined. This bowling alley is where I learned that dreams come true if we carry hope more than doubt.
Braxton sets a twenty-ounce glass of beer in front of me. He’s had a long day at the hardware store and wants a moment outside his estrogen-filled home. He and I used to bowl whenever I visited as a teenager. Yes, my adoptive parents thought it was important to continue my relationships with my people back in Hillpike. It was on me, not my adoptive parents if I ever strayed from doing that. They used to book a room at the Holiday Inn near the center of town. I’d invite a couple of my childhood friends and Braxton over to swim and chat. Braxton was much older then but would still slide by for a couple of hours.
“So, how the hell is Dustin? Have you talked to him lately?” Braxton questions.
“Good. He seems happy and carefree. He’s learning how to fish up there in Washington. A couple of weeks ago or so, he told me he met a friend who also has divorced parents who are with other people now. I find it disheartening that I trust Courtney’s parents more than I trust her with our son.”
“Crazy, but I get it. Glad the kid realizes how blessed he is. He has a great father, and that’s something I’ve never experienced. Any other word from your lawyer?”
Braxton picks out his bowling ball and places it in the bowl rack. The old man has to get a ball a couple of pounds lighter than me.
“He tried reaching out to Courtney’s lawyer only to find out Courtney fired her and is looking for another.”
“Really?”
“I say all this sloppiness she’s doing is digging her a bigger hole and hurting her chances of gaining full custody of Dustin. I miss my little guy.”
