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Ava narrowed her eyes. “Is this what’s been going on in that head of yours when you were in bed the whole month?”
I nodded. “Yeah, introspection is a bitch.”
“I’ll say.” Ava sighed. “Are you sure this is what you want to do?”
“I haven’t been more sure of anything in my life,” I said.
“You know your dad is going to hate it,” Ava said with a smile.
My face split into a grin, too. “I know.”
Ava left the office, muttering to herself, still shaking her head, and I turned my attention back to the screen. I clicked around, looking for more information.
I had no idea what I was doing. I was jumping into this with my eyes closed, but that was how I wanted it. I’d lived my whole life tightly wound up in bubble wrap. It had always been safe, easy, comfortable, and I was sick of it. I wanted adventure. I wanted memories. The most exciting thing that had ever happened in my life until now was that camping trip from hell, and that was saying something. I’d never done anything.
Despite the hell we’d been through—the storms, the wild, the injuries, the heartbreak—I’d liked breaking free from the restraints that I’d been shackled with my whole life, and I wanted more of that.
Lorenzo had broken free from his family when he’d been younger. He’d eventually found he’d wanted to go back, but he’d broken free first to know that. It was my turn to spread my wings and fly.
I had no idea if I had what it took to do this, but I wouldn’t know until I tried, and I wanted to do something that took me out of my comfort zone again. It was the only way I would find myself, and if I ended up wanting to go back to the life I’d always lived, then that was fine. At least I would know it was what I wanted. If I didn’t… I guess I would find out what the next step was when I got there.
I’d never been this excited about anything in my life. I’d never wanted to do something so crazy.
I called Anna and Lexi to get together so I could tell them the news. I had to tellsomeone, and if anyone would understand, it was them. Lexi was different—she’d grown up in a life where new things were the order of the day. Anna was the type of person to stand on her own two feet.
They would get it.
When I met with them later that day for coffee, they both hugged me as if they hadn’t seen me since the accident, as if they’d both been nervous I’d slipped through their fingers for good.
“I’m okay, guys,” I said when we sat down and they glanced nervously at me. “I’m fine.”
“You were in a bad spot for a while there,” Lexi said.
I nodded. “Yeah. I had to work through a lot.”
“Anna told me about Lorenzo,” Lexi said softly. “I’m sorry.”
I shook my head. “I’m not here to talk about him. I’m here with good news!”
I told them what I’d decided to do. The more I talked, the more Lexi’s eyes widened, and Anna looked uncertain.
“Are you sure this is what you want to do?” Lexi finally asked.
“Why does everyone keep asking me that?” I cried out.
“It’s not supposed to be a bad thing,” Anna said quickly. “It’s just that it’s sodifferent.It’s notyou.”
“That’s the point,” I said, shaking my hair back and tying it into a ponytail. “If I went all the way to the edge of death and came back unchanged, something is seriously wrong with me. Life’s too short, you know? There’s so much world out there to discover, and I’ve lived in a bubble. It’s time to pop that bitch.”
Lexi and Anna both stared at me before they burst out laughing. It only took a second before their laughter drew me in, and I started laughing too.
“I can’t believe this,” Lexi said. “After everything, Celine Forger is going hiking.”
“I’m so proud of you,” Anna said, a big smile still plastered on her face. “You have no idea how incredible you are.”
The words rocked through me. Incredible? Me?
“I know things have been tough,” Lexi said and squeezed my hand. “This is the best outcome anyone could have asked for. You know we’re rooting for you.”
