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“I filled up both tanks after the party yesterday. To engage the unit, flip this switch—”
“And push the red button. Got it.” Matt demonstrated before Jack locked the pen up again and handed him the keys. “How do you think I’m failing her? She’s alive. It’s been rough, but—”
“Rough? She’s at the end of her rope. And your face tells me you know it. She needs a sense of shelter, structure, and someone who’s in fucking control. Right now, you’re none of those things. Before you object, no, I don’t know your history with Madison, just that you have one. Since we only have a handful of minutes, I’m going to be blunt.”
“I’m doing my best to protect her.” But Jack’s words hit a nerve.
“Madison needs more.”
“Like what? I’m trying to stay one step ahead of that bastard she’s married to—”
“You’ve kept her out of Todd Pershing’s clutches. Hats off. The good news is, he ain’t coming here unless he has a death wish,” Jack drawled. “But how are you helping her cope with the fucking upheaval in her life? Four days ago, she lived with one of the most influential families in this country, probably in one of the ritziest neighborhoods. She didn’t worry about someone violently snuffing her out. Now she’s trying to cope with thatandthe loss of everything she knows. How are you helping her?”
Matt swallowed. The short answer was, he hadn’t done nearly enough. Madison had come to him for protection. First, he’d pawned her off on Nash. It had seemed logical…but how much of that had been him protecting his heart? Then after Nash had nearly given his life to save hers, how had he soothed and calmed her? By fucking her rough and dirty on the nearest flat surface.
Matt winced. “How do I give her security and structure and everything she needs? I’m making this up as I go. By myself, I can’t fight a family like the Pershings. They’ll squash me.”
“They absolutely will. But you’re not alone in this. Let’s break it down. Deke is negotiating on your girl’s behalf. He’ll cut a deal that will allow Madison to get on with her life. In the meantime, your bosses will keep your ass covered, so to anyone in the surveillance state, it will look like your schedule and behavior haven’t changed much, except maybe you took a staycation around the holiday. They’ll probably also assign someone to stay in your house to fend off any potential ‘fact-finding’ intruders.”
Likely Ethan. Since joining the team, the kid hadn’t put down much in the way of roots, jumping from one party girl’s bed to another temporary pad. And as much as Matt disliked the idea of the asshole in his personal space, that was hardly his biggest concern. “You’re right.”
“And I’ll keep you two in food and necessities, so take all those worries off your plate. Any others you need help with so you can start addressing hers?”
Matt bristled at the challenge in the terse Cajun’s tone. “No. I’ve been up in my own head about some personal shit, but I realize Madison needs more than a basic protector.”
Hadn’t he suspected that for a while? Yeah, and he felt like a shit for not being there for her sooner.
Jack cocked his head, his dark eyes dissecting. “I’m going to cut to the chase. You want to know how, in a few minutes, I got her from being too afraid to take my hand and get in the boat to trusting me with her safety and even calling me ‘sir,’ right?”
“Yeah. You stood up taller and seemed to project authority while you demanded she do what you told her.”
“I commanded her to do something that, deep down, she needed but was afraid to. I not only assured her that she would be perfectly safe, but I gave her approval to let go of her fear. And I injected just enough edge in my voice to let her know I would be displeased if she failed to acquiesce. Then I verbally rewarded her bravery and obedience.”
“That sounds like the way a parent talks to a child.”
“I’m well aware that she’s a woman—a very frightened one.” Then Jack dropped a bomb. “But she’s also a submissive.”
Matt’s gut tensed. “You don’t know that. You don’t know her.”
But hadn’t he already suspected that?
“After a couple of decades in the lifestyle, I see her. She’s sweet. She’s compliant. And she’s a pleaser.”
Being the silly little pleaser I was, I bleached my hair.
“I’ll bet”—Jack drawled—“she’s consented to do things—things you asked or demanded of her—that surprised you. And the fact she loved them shocked you even more. Am I wrong?”
When you stare at me like you own me and you growl my name…I want to drop to my knees and beg you.
Holy shit. How had the big Cajun picked up on Madison’s cues so quickly? Was he psychicandcrazy?
“Fuck.”
“You’re catching on. Good.”
“How is it good to crawl around in her head and demand she do and say things she wouldn’t normally, just because I want her to? My dad does this to women. It’s a pattern he repeats over and over. He ran my mom off when I was just a kid. His last girlfriend couldn’t take it anymore and, in a pleading, screaming, crying fit, blew her brains out all over his kitchen. I don’t want to be responsible for that. Madison is smart and kind. But she’s fragile, and she doesn’t deserve my bullshit.”
Jack froze, those dark eyes of his like a crowbar forcing their way into Matt’s psyche. “You’re looking at this wrong,mon ami. Think of it as taking the control you require while giving her the foundation she needs. And in case you haven’t guessed, she does those things that shock you because shewantsto. She wouldn’t do them otherwise. Your demands give her mental permission. They tell her that her desires are okay.”
