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I laugh, and when I pick up my head, he’s staring at me. “What?”
“I just want to be with you tonight. Calista—”
I place my finger over his lips. “Rylan, you will not give up your dream for me. You’re healthy and have years left of your career. Maybe things will change in the future. Maybe I’ll come to Chicago and visit.”
His eyes light up and I hate that I might have given him false hope. We don’t work like that. We can’t do casual for longer than this week. I can’t pop into town for a booty call just to leave on Monday morning with a wave and “Until next time” on my lips. We burn too hot for that.
“I don’t want to talk about it right now. Let’s enjoy our best friends’ wedding.”
He nods and pulls me closer. He spins me around, not as suave as Declan, but I’m okay with that.
“Can you keep a secret?” he whispers, looking around as if someone could be listening. Then again, who knows around here?
“Do I want to know?”
“I’m not sure.”
I give him a weird look and he shrugs. “What?”
“We would have been first.” He smiles as though he’s happy the secret’s out and I should be ecstatic about it, but I have no idea what he’s talking about.
I look into his eyes. “First for what?”
“I had the ring. I still do.”
My heart clenches and wetness pools in my eyes. “Are you saying you were going to propose but didn’t?”
Rylan’s a smart guy. I don’t understand why he would tell me this right now. Especially when he’s getting on a plane tomorrow to head back to Chicago.
“That’s exactly what I’m saying.”
The temperature in my veins rises. “Why are you telling me this now?”
He shakes his head. “I don’t know, but I just… it’s the only thing you didn’t know about me.”
“When?” I stop moving and my breath struggles to leave my lungs. “When were you going to propose?”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t think it would upset you. I just… it was selfish for me to tell you.”
“Rylan, when?”
“The night of the accident. Your accident.”
A strangled whimper escapes me and I close my eyes, tears streaming down my face. “Excuse me.”
I rush out of the venue, unable to face the idea of what would’ve, could’ve, and should’ve been.
Twenty-Eight
Rylan
“Fuck!”
“What did you do?” Aubrey blocks me from leaving the reception.
“It’s between us.” I sidestep her and rush out after Calista.
Looking to my right, I spot her going out the back patio doors. I jog over to her. It’s freezing. The venue has hung up string lights across the patio and she stands at the edge, staring at the sky.
