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I really needed to trade my best friend in for a new one. This one was lacking in empathy.
ME: Are you done?
AMBER: I will never be done. When did you find that out?
ME: As we were pulling up to the castle, pretty much.
AMBER: NOOOOO THIS MAN IS MY HERO
See?
Maybe this model of best friend had a manufacturer’s recall on it for a faulty part.
I quickly tapped out the entire story, pausing only to adjust my towel around my chest to make sure it didn’t fall down just in case William walked in. I didn’t think he would since he knew I was showering, but I was a woman.
I did have a tendency to sit in my towel for half a century after each shower.
AMBER: OMG. So what are you gonna do? Are you staying?
ME: I’m here now, aren’t I? And I kind of offered to be his fake girlfriend for the week.
AMBER: What. The. Fuck.
ME: Yeah, kind of feeling that way after my shower.
AMBER: So you, the great aristocrat hating aristocrat, who has sworn never to date or marry an aristocrat, are pretending to be the girlfriend of an aristocrat so his grandfather doesn’t set him up with another aristocrat.
ME: I don’t think you said aristocrat enough times.
AMBER: Does he have any idea who your dad is?????
ME: No. He doesn’t even know my surname. I want to keep it that way.
AMBER: How are you going to do that? The people coming to this wedding are going to be in your circles, Grace. Your dad’s circles at least. They’ll know you.
Huh.
She was right.
AMBER: How do you know your dad and Carmen aren’t going??? This is the kind of thing they’d get invited to.
She was right again.
This was annoying.
ME: Neither of them mentioned it at dinner, and it’s the kind of thing Carmen likes to brag about. There’s also a chance I don’t know any of their close friends anymore. It’s not like I’ve done any of Dad’s fancy stuff for years because Carmen was there. I didn’t know William, after all.
AMBER: I suppose. You do need to have a plan for it though. Is he on board with this???
ME: William?
AMBER: No, the Muffin Man.
Great. Now I was going to be humming that nursery rhyme all day.
ME: Thanks for the earworm. And yes, he’s on board with it. Benefits him, doesn’t it??
AMBER: IDK, sounds like he owes you for this.
