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Even as we worked efficiently, a part of me still longed for April’s sunshine presence. The single time she’d helped with the drying, she’d voiced such random questions.
“What would happen if I got locked in there with the grain?”
“You would die, princess,”I’d answered incredulously. It was pretty bloody obvious. At its warmest, the drying room reached around eight degrees celsius.
“Yes. But how?”
She’d been genuinely curious, knowing my interest in anatomy perhaps. So I answered to the best of my ability. She’d only smirked and said,“So cool.”
Little freak. There could be none of that now.
I shovelled harder as the realisation clanged through me, sweating as I broke the already small chunks of dry peat into even smaller pieces. The heat from the fire roared, only stoking the tangle of emotions that coursed through me every time I remembered what happened last night. What I’d done.
April had started it, sort of. It was more like a mutual starting… but I definitely finished it. I was the first to initiate contact, pulling her against me in the bed because I’d been absolutely desperate to touch her in some small way. And seeing her so scared—comforting her had felt good.So fucking right.
Thenshekissedme.
I still couldn’t make sense of it in my mind and I’d dissected it from every angle, replaying the moment so many times I could reenact the entire encounter from memory alone. The only reasoning I could come up with: she was upset about Kier and wanted comfort. And I’d shot it all to hell by pouncing on her like a dying man in the desert.
Iwasin the desert—a sexual desert, if you will. My dry spell was so long it had become my natural climate rather than a lengthy summer. Yet I’d acclimated. Women had come on to me in the past, Jasmine only months ago. I’d said no. Lack of sex was not the issue here.Aprilwas the issue. Wanting her beyond reason was the issue. And I’d proven now that I could no longer be trusted alone with her.
I hadn’t gone up to the manor this morning. Hadn’t retrieved Boy. He’d wandered his way in an hour ago and I knew it was from her encouragement. Callum questioned it while bending to give him a pat, and I answered honestly that he’d stayed at the manor the night before, too messed up to even consider lying. Thankfully, I had enough sense not to mention that I’d dry humped the world-famous actress who lived there, already coming in my pants by the time I pulled back. I alone would be privy to that level of shame.
“Couldn’t drag yourself away, huh?” For a moment, I thought Callum was talking to me, then he gave Boy’s cheeks a ruffle and continued.“Can’t say I blame you.”A growl scorched up my throat like dragon fire and I only just managed to staunch it. Of course he was interested in April. Even my dog was besotted with her. Was it the copious amount of peanut butter treats she kept in her pockets or the green eyes that drew him in? Either way, we had dangerously similar tastes.
I felt Callum’s attention and paused, wiping sweat from my forehead.“I said, Mum’s going to call you today.” He grabbed his metal water bottle and drank deeply. He offered it to me and I took it.
“Why?” I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand, tasting peat on my lips.
“Why do you think?” He didn’t give me a chance to answer.“Lunch on Saturday, you haven’t been for over a month.”
For good reason, I didn’t say.“I’ve been busy,” I muttered.
“Too busy to show Mum you’re not dead. When was the last time you even called?” I winced. I loved my mother fiercely, but with my mum always came my dad.“I’m not trying to guilt you,” he said, reading my expression in that way I hated.
“Oh, really?” When did I become so transparent? The answer was sitting a hundred yards away, lovingly restoring the tasting room ahead of the event next week.
“I’m just stating a fact.” He dropped his shovel again and turned to me, slicking his sweat-soaked hair back.“Just come to lunch and you’ll be good for at least another month.”
I hated when he made it sound as though spending time with my family was a chore, because it was the truth. Sometimes it did feel that way. I wanted to say it wasn’t personal, that after an hour withanylarge group of people I felt as though I needed to sleep for a week. But I didn’t know how, so I only said,“Fine.”
He nodded once.“Good. You should call her first, she’ll appreciate that.”
Christ.I pulled my phone from my pocket, waving it aloft before I dialled. He gave a small smile of approval and nodded to the door. She answered on the third ring.“Is that my elusive wee boy?”
Guilt slammed through me.“Hey, Mum. Sorry—”
“None of that.” She’d never once made me apologise for my quirks.“Callum told you about lunch on Saturday.”
Told me, like I didn’t know it happened every bloody week. She was giving me an out I didn’t deserve.“Aye.” My throat worked.“I’ll be there.”
“Good, that’s good, Mal. Your dad and I can’t wait to see you.”
Your dad and I. I stared into the flames, listening to the crackle as she told me all about the new art commission she was working on. I barely heard a word of it. Knowing I hated talking on the phone, she didn’t keep me long, promising to catch up properly in a few days. As soon as I hung up, the murmur of voices drifted from outside.
Ewan wasn’t working until later this afternoon. They could only belong to two people. Any notion of avoiding April fled and I ducked out into the muggy air before I could pause to think about what I was doing. What I would even say.
Standing close together, my brother and April laughed conspiratorially. That flirtatious smirk of his lips while he watched her head tip back, revealing the length of her regal neck.
