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I couldn’t feel anything but the aches in my body. Disappointment sank into me as guilt bloomed. I thought I’d ruined things by coming, but this sudden, bitter distance tearing into me showed me where her real limit was.
She’d drawn a fucking line in the sand, and I burst through it. Turns out it was a line only she could cross. I was hers to command, but one foot across the line and she was running scared. It wasn’t fair.
Frustration dominated me as I gripped the towel on my legs, the only piece of her she’d left. The anger that had me locked in this room sizzled again. Was that really it? Was that how it was going to be now? We played on her terms, but the moment I tried to connect, she would fuck off?
I tipped myself down on the bed, the back of my hand riding my forehead as I stared at the ceiling. It was the same position I took every night when I revelled in my obsession with her and argued with myself about why I couldn’t be with her. I’d trapped myself in this sideshow with Bunny, but the idea of backing off from Cat was a joke, even if she was supposedly with Dom, the same way I was supposedly with Bun. Just being in the same room as her was like a drug. She was my fix, the thing I needed to soothe my craving.
I ran my tongue over my teeth, trying to figure out what was happening.
Cat was going to keep tearing out my heart, and I was going to keep on taking it. I’d wanted her to destroy me, punish me, show me her real self, and now that she was actually burning me, I realised what an idiot I was for thinking this was good enough. I’d never be satisfied until she admitted she loved me. I might have broken and lost in the race to pleasure, but I’d outlast her when it came to love. It just required patience.
Even though I’d been so desperate for her to touch my cock, I’d been waiting ten years for her to return. I could wait. She’d come around. She’d see I was the only one who could give her everything she wanted. She just needed to wake up and see it.
Cat
Shit. Shit. Shit.
I was a fucking coward. I was running from his room, wiping my lips, clearing corridors and stairs, and trying to find somewhere to hide. The hotel bathrooms were somewhere on the ground floor. I spotted the door as I cleared the last step. Flying through it, I slammed into a cubicle, not caring if anyone saw or heard me.
I didn’t want him to kiss me. Just hearing him crying out my name in his pathetic raspy tone had driven me to the edge, especially after the fierceness of the fight. But the kiss was too personal, too intimate, too close to the dreams I had of being in love with him. If I’d let it go on any longer, I would have sunk into his arms and never left.
I lifted the toilet lid, pushed my thong to my bent knees, and thrust my fingers into myself as I fell backwards. I came before my ass hit the seat, my legs giving way as I crashed through my orgasm, rolling my hips into my fingers while I gave my nipple a desperate pull through my bra. I bit my lip, tasting him, trying not to call his name even though it thundered through my mind, a mix of pleasure and regret.
I clung to myself, panting, letting it all fade to a dull thud. That could have been his. He could have held me, stroked me, kissed me through it, whispering how much he loved me as I trembled in his arms.
Thank God I got out of there. That was the sexiest thing I’d ever done. He’d been so thick, sinking into my mouth like it was home.
I tried to hold back the groan as the noises he made spun in my ears. He loved it. I fucked him with my fingers, and he cried out for more. Watching him come undone was addictive. He was beautiful when he was falling apart. He trusted me to take care of him and pleasure him, and it softened the last wall inside me when he looked at me with longing and reached for my lips.
I pushed myself up against the wall of the cubicle, my hand splayed out above me, trying to focus on breathing, even though my pussy was quivering and begging for more.
That’s why I ran. Because I wanted it. I wanted to let him take me, hold me, and shelter us from all the shit we put each other through and just love each other for who we were instead of whoever we used to be. It terrified me that, even when I dominated him, he still controlled me.
He’d decimated Venom in front of a crowd for me, his knuckles ripped, still bleeding as he lay there begging and calling my name. Weak, helpless, pliable, and wanting. It was gorgeous, knowing I was the one making that raging beast come undone. I could ruin him with two fingers, yet the moment he took my lips, I exploded with fear and longing.
I rested back against the toilet, tipping my head back in a silent prayer as my slow breathing rooted me, bringing me down, back into myself.
I was done for. I couldn’t go back after this. There was no use pretending I could hide these feelings.
What was I supposed to say? ‘Max, the way you punched that prick in the face made me so proud and horny that I’m just going to fuck you all night, okay?’
I couldn’t believe this had even become an option. What the fuck was wrong with me? Was I going to spend the rest of my life having fiery hate sex with Max?
I groaned and hung my head. That actually sounded great.I hate himhad become such a weak excuse.He broke my heart.Yeah, but I was taking my sweet revenge by pulling him apart each time we met, right?He’s bad for you.How? All he’d done was eye fuck me until we stripped down the layers between us, and he became a writhing mess in my arms. He kept proving he wanted me in whatever way he could, and it was getting me every time.
There was no point arguing with my dignity. It fled the moment I wrapped my fingers around Max’s neck. Now here I was, getting off in a hotel bathroom because I didn’t want to show him how much I craved feeling him inside me.
I needed to sort myself out. I couldn’t keep going like this. Something had to break, and I needed to make sure it wasn’t me.
Cat
Imoaned as a fresh wave of heat flooded my body. I was so hot. Everything was so hot. I could barely think. I knew I was in bed, but my bed could have been floating in the middle of the ocean, and I wouldn’t have noticed.
A cool hand touched my forehead. The relief was instant, and I sighed into it, trying to get closer.
“How long has she been like this?” Harry’s voice.
I wanted to open my eyes, reach for my brother through the haze, but everything burned too deeply. My arms were lead, and I was swimming in a river of sweat, my clothes glued to my body. Why was I still like this? It had been more than a week. I thought I was getting better.
