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“Well, I think that’s a mistake.”
“Look, when this job’s over, she’ll go back to her life, and I’ll go back to mine.”
Stan eyed him through the curling cigarette smoke. “You’re lying to yourself, if you believe that bullshit.”
“I’m not good for her. Man, shit haunts me, and I barely make it through the days myself. I don’t want to drag her down with me. She deserves so much more.”
Stan shook his head. “I’ve seen what you’re like without her. Dusty, this is the first time I’ve seen you look happy, look at ease. Hell, not want to go free dive off a cliff just to make it through the day. She’s good for you and you’re good for her. The sooner you admit that shit, the better it will be for both of you.” He stamped out his cigarette butt and headed inside, calling over his shoulder as he disappeared down the hall. “Something to ponder while you stare at that road for the next several hours.”
At five in the morning, Stan came to relieve Dusty again, but he was too wired to sleep and didn’t want to disturb Asia, so he headed to the kitchen to make breakfast.
An hour later, when he went up to wake her with coffee and a tray of food, he found her standing on the balcony watching the sunrise.
Setting the tray down, he walked up behind her and kissed her shoulder, stunned when she shrugged it off.
“Don’t.”
He heard the wrath in her voice.
“What’s wrong?” He frowned, clueless. Things had been so good when he’d left her just hours ago.
“I heard you.”
He pulled his chin to the side, still ignorant. “Heard me?”
“You and Stan talking last night. You told him this is just fun. Just some good sex. That it wasn’t a real relationship.”
His eyes slid closed as his words came back to bite him. “That’s not what I—”
“Meant?” She cut him off. “I heard you. Every word carried to me. I went inside when I heard you say you’ll go back to your life. I didn’t want to hear anymore. I can only imagine what else you said.”
“Asia, you’re wrong.”
“Bullshit.”
Her language surprised him, and he took a step back.
***
Asia jerked her chin up. “Maybe you’re right, Dusty. Maybe we’re kidding ourselves with this.” She gestured her hand between them. “We’renotin a relationship. Youdon’tlove me.”
“Don’t tell me how I feel.”
“Those areyourwords, not mine. You wrote them to me, and then never had the decency to explain why.” Asia let the rage and sorrow pour out of her. “You left me shattered and broken and unsure of myself.” She jabbed her finger at his chest. “So don’t you stand there and lie to me and tell me to open myself up to you just so you can take aim at my heart again.”
“Asia, I never stopped loving you.”
“Stop lying to me.”
“Do I have to spell it out for you? You were my friend’s little sister, and I was gone with no promise of return.”
“We knew both those things when you left,” she snapped.
“I was watching soldiers fly home in body bags. You had your whole life ahead of you. I didn’t know when I’d be able to see you again or if I’d even make it home to you. I didn’t want you pining away for someone who wasn’t coming home.”
“But you did come home.”
“No, I didn’t. Only a piece of me made it back. And the piece that did was broken and twisted and not deserving of something so perfect.”
