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Evangeline: I guess we’re going to drown our sorrows in litres of alcohol and bad techno music.
Topper: Oh babe…
Quickly, I go to Mum’s contact details and ring her. I need the soothing sounds of her voice. I need her words to calm my raging heart, but mostly, I need an ally.
“Evangeline, my love, I was just about to call you.”
“Mum?” I whisper, hearing how my voice cracks under the weight of that single word.
“Oh dear, what’s wrong?”
“He won’t listen. He won’t budge. There are other solutions. There must be.” I gasp with my heart splintering apart. Why do we have to walk this route and not another? Downsizing and working hard sounds doable and it’s less of a threat to my future.
“Lovely, we went over everything already with the financial advisors. This is the only way to save your father’s dream.” Her sweet voice hurts more because this isn’t what I want to hear.
“But, Mum, I’m going to be forced to marry a stranger.” I seethe as tears stream down my face.
“It’s not that bad, lovely. I married Gavin without really knowing him and we’re living an okay life.” The tears stop running, and I swallow the pain away, feeling my heart hardening.
“Why are you not on my side?” I whisper.
“Don’t be silly. I am on your side, but I know when the road leads to a dead end and when we need to create another one. I married Gavin already, your brother is working like a dog, and what are you doing, Evangeline?” My mouth parts as guilt spreads over me. Am I really that terrible, that selfish? Why am I the only one fighting this when they have accepted the way things need to be.
“All right,” I mumble, but my voice doesn’t sound like my own.
“It’ll be okay, lovely.” I nod my head, but that small voice in my head will never agree, and with it continuing to rage inside my head, I end the call.
Chapter Nine
Chester
10 years old
“Do you love him?” Mum looks up from her cookbook. Her dark grey eyes connect with mine. She doesn’t answer my question.
“I…I—”
“Do you love him, Mum?” I repeat, hoping her answer will be positive. People get married because they love each other, right? Mum and Dad just have a weird way of showing it. Other parents occasionally fight, and mine just fight a lot, but that doesn’t mean there’s no love between them.
“I don’t know how to answer that question, Chester.” I frown because it doesn’t make sense. You either do or you don’t. Sebastian’s parents mention how much they love each other all the time. I’ve seen them whisper it to their partner multiple times when I go play at Sebastian’s.
But my parents don’t. They never do.
They still don’t hug, hold hands or kiss. My friends call it disgusting when their parents do that, but I want my parents to prove that they love each other. I just want to see them hug once. Just once.
I want nothing more than to see them hug once. Maybe then I’ll sleep better and not fear them leaving each other.
“Isn’t it a yes or no question?” Mum looks back down at her cookbook, and I don’t think she wants to answer my question. Does this mean she really doesn’t love him?
“Chester, why don’t you help me make these biscuits.”
“Mum, do you love Dad?” I ask, playing with my fingers, but my heart is racing in my chest. I stare at her, waiting patiently to tell me that she does.Please just love him.
She shakes her head slowly, and it pierces my heart. It crumbles to pieces, and I gasp for air.
“What do you mean? You don’t love him?” I panic. My chair tumbles to the ground because I stand up too quickly. Thoughts fly through my head. How is this possible? They’re married. They live together. You marry someone when you love them.
“I’m sorry, Chester.”
