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After we’re done eating and he pays the bill, we drive back. I purposely leave my hand near the center console to see if he takes it. I’ve become desperate for his touch. This is a side of Reid that I have never witnessed. He leaves clues. Little tidbits that make you fall for him, and I’m falling. Hard.
When we turn on a familiar road back to campus, I pull my hand back, disappointed he didn’t hold it. I guess this is all I’m getting for the night.
“Thank you for the food. It was nice.”
“You’re welcome.” I see his fingers tapping the steering wheel nervously. He slows the car down at the stop sign. If he goes straight, it takes us toward Kenyan. If he makes a right, we end up at Dravin’s house off-campus. It feels like we are at a crossroad. “Do you want to stay the night with me? It’s late, and it’s just to sleep. I don’t expect–”
I turn my head, giving him a smile and flashing my teeth when I blurt, “I would love to.” He smiles, turning the wheel and heading to where he stays with Dravin.
* * *
We enter the house, and it is quiet. It is the beginning of February, so it is still cold outside. The fire is lit, casting a romantic glow in the living room. Is Gia here with one twin or both? Maybe she is at the main house with her men.
Reid closes the front door, brushes past my shoulder, and whispers, “They’re not here. It is just us.”
Despite my nervousness, I’m excited to be here alone with Reid. I can’t think of anything except how he is and acts around me. There is something about the way he consumes me. If he stares at me, I get lost in his black eyes, the color of a dark galaxy. There is nothing and no one at that moment except him. Except us. Everything else just fades away.
I follow him up the stairs to his room, remembering the last time I was here and practically out of it. He took care of me, and he didn’t take advantage. He discreetly called a doctor to check me out and ensured I was alright. Even though he didn’t follow up with me afterward, it doesn’t change the fact that he saved me in a way. He didn’t judge me, even if he was upset that I didn’t tell him what happened and with whom.
He turns the knob of his bedroom, pushes the door open, and steps aside to let me in. Both times I have been here, it was under different circumstances but now I can take my time and let it sink in. My eyes find the king-size bed, promising comfort. A big contrast to the bed back home with the hard springs that dug into my sides as I got older.
I honestly prefer the reason I am here now. I couldn’t appreciate Reid when we had sex the first time in this room because I was too busy chasing away a demon, but not tonight. Tonight, I’m with him because I want to be here. I want to feel him next to me.
Deep down I have fallen for Reid without meaning to. My thoughts fly to Z, and a wave of guilt filters over me, but then it fades because a few encounters and a couple of letters don’t count as a relationship. What I truly want is behind me, and he doesn’t know it because I’m too much of a coward to express my feelings for him. It just happened, and it doesn’t matter how often Michael blackmails me, and I try to erase what he has done to me. My feelings for Reid stay the same. I think they always will.
Reid pulls the covers back, and his head lifts when he notices I don’t move. His midnight eyes lock with mine. “I won’t touch you if you don’t want me to, Jess. You have a choice. If that makes you more comfortable, I can sleep in the spare room.”
My lips part because that is the last thing I want. I want him to hold me. I want him to make love to me. Even if it is just for one night, I like sex to feel different…with him.
“What if I want you to touch me,” I say softly.
He looks so grown up in his dress pants and shirt, and I imagine we just came from a dinner with our friends, and I’m his wife. He’s turning the bed down, waiting for me to undress, so we can make love for the millionth time, and it feels like the first time every time.
“Then, I’ll touch you how you want me to, and if you tell me to stop, I will.”
A silent tear slides down my cheek, and I approach him. He stands at his full height when my chest ghosts his torso. “Don’t stop,” I say.
He lifts my sweater over my head and undoes my bra, throwing it across the room. He pushes me onto the bed, my feet hanging over the hedge. He bends to remove my boots and pulls my leggings off one leg and then the other.
I’m left in my panties, leaning on my elbows on the mattress, watching him undo the buttons on his dress shirt. His skin is perfect, with no blemishes. His tattoos of death and angels are drawn over his skin like beautiful works of art.
His eyes skate down from my nipples to my thighs and then back to my face. “You’re beautiful, Jess. Has anyone told you that?”
“Not the right people.”
He undoes his belt, and his pants drop along with his boxers. His cock juts out with a piercing at the tip. “Am I the right person, Jess?”
I lick my lips nervously because I want to wrap my mouth around the head of his cock and taste him. I close my eyes because, with sex, I always erase what I didn’t want to happen, but I can’t use him for that. The first time I have given oral sex was when Michael forced me to that night in his Mustang. If I allow it, my heart wants it, and my soul begs for it. Right now, it’s begging for him.
“Yes.”
He grips the base of his cock, and I look up at the beautiful head with a Prince Albert piercing, wondering how it would feel raw against my tongue.
“Do you want me, baby?”
I nod slowly, my chest rising and falling. My nipples pearl under the heat of his gaze, and I push myself off the bed to swipe my tongue over the head and hear him growl. I moan, taking him inside my mouth.
“Fuck, Jess.”
