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“Brian, Beth?” Jessica asked.
“Jessica, I’m so sorry,” Beth said with tears in her voice and barely breathing. “Lars had Brian’s number and I called but he didn’t answer.”
“Text it to me,” Jessica said as she hung up. Was it true? Not even true love could keep a person with her? The text came through, but Jessica was scared to call.
“Did my screen lock up?” Clara asked.
Jessica shook her head no.
She called Brian’s number and heard the phone ring. It was like a death knell. The second ring and her heart started to shrivel and coil in on itself. By the third ring it was controlled hysteria that had a grip on her.
He was gone. He was gone. Three words repeated in her head like a mantra. How could this have happened? How could she have been found so wanting? Then she decided she knew the problem. He couldn’t answer the phone because he was driving. He probably had his phone synced to the car. When Jessica opened the text screen, her mind went blank. What to text? The story of the stairs, the snake and a sprained ankle?
Finally, she decided to type the only message she thought mattered: Don’t go. I’m late. I choose you. I love you.
By the time Beth got back, Clara and another older woman showed up with a crutch. They drove her to Brian’s. When she got to the cottage that Brian had rented she saw some Tupperware out front. Jessica’s hopes rose. Maybe he knew she would come by, and the food was his way of saying he knew she had made the right choice but there were some extenuating circumstances.
When she hobbled to the door and looked at the food, there was a sign on it. It said, Free Food take it. She almost fell onto the floor. The other women came out and caught her before she fell.
He had really left.
He didn’t even believe she’d come by later.
The world had conspired against her, and it had won. The love of her life thought she had chosen money and career over him. She hobbled back to the car with the women’s assistance. When she was in the car she let the tears fall. The other women discreetly looked away and Jessica looked out the window as they drove back to After Hours.
When they reached After Hours, the board members were there. She didn’t care. She just wanted to be left alone but they stopped her.
“I know the world feels like it’s over but when he comes back, you two will work it out,” Retro said.
Blue came up to her and hugged her. “It’s not often I agree with that relic but this time he’s right. These spats you two have and then one of you goes on business will be the norm. Especially if one or both of you become a CFO. It’s a stable home life that makes us or breaks us in the office. It’s why Middleton left before he didn’t have a stable home life.”
Jessica nodded and then went upstairs. She sat on the bed and let the despair engulf her. This was what she had always feared, being alone. It was so much harder when you knew what had been lost. After ten minutes of wallowing in pity, Jessica shook her head and said ‘No’ out loud. She knew how to fight. She would fight for Brian, that is if he wanted her anymore. She had to prepare for Pilar’s coming but she was also preparing to face Brian and heal the rift, if it could be done.
Chapter Twenty
On the day of the grand opening, Pilar called to say she wouldn’t be able to make it.
Beth took the message. Pilar didn’t even bother talking to her. Jessica cleared her throat and kept up with the preparations. It would be great. Jessica thought if she just kept saying that she would be fine.
Jessica was used to disappointment, so she didn't really know why she was taking it so hard. It was bound to happen that something else would come up that would be more important than her event and definitely more important than her. Maybe it wasn't until that moment that Jessica realized that she really needed Pilar to come in order to keep her mind away from Brian.
Again, the regret came rolling back. Pilar didn't think she was the kind of person to alter her schedule for and Brian didn't think she was the kind of person to hold up his schedule for. It was at these moments that she would fall down into the pit of despair and wallow in the misery. However, she knew that at the end of the day it wasn't really about what Pilar thought about her or what Brian thought about her. It was all about what Jessica thought about herself.
Jessica had come to the conclusion that as long as she believed in herself, she could press forward and get anything done. After all, she was known for getting the impossible done when it was for other people, she knew she could produce the same result when it was for her.
After surveying her and Beth’s work, she could say she had never been prouder. There was an office in the back Beth couldn’t wait to show Clay. Until he arrived it had become yarn central. There was outdoor seating and places for the guys to bring in their tack boxes. There was a microwave on the side next to a small oven that in a flash could make coffee and tea the way it was supposed to be made in a kettle, so Lars claimed. The shelf was lined with a Keurig and cups of all sizes and shapes. The fridge was still small, but the coolers held more than enough. The inside was a warm yellow that invited everyone in. There were clusters of tables and two-family style tables. It was all that she had wanted it to be.
The admiration of her work was interrupted by Ms. Cruz asking for an update on her schedule. What had made Jessica think that no answer meant no? Ms. Cruz was more determined than a dog with a bone, than a troll and his bridge, than a leprechaun and his gold. Now she was asking what time tonight she was arriving, and Jessica had to admit she had trepidation to say no. On the one hand, she hadn’t ever said she was going. Then again on the other hand, she hadn’t said she wasn’t.
It was afternoon and the doors had been thrown open and no one was coming. No one from Peace came and no Brian. He was supposed to be back this morning. Jessica took it as confirmation that he really had left and thought she had chosen the career and money. It was one more nail in the coffin of her self-confidence.
Looking around the empty place, she had to accept that even the town of Peace didn’t want anything she had to offer. Maybe they were waiting for her to pack up, as well.
Lars came into After Hours and looked around.
“I came early since we didn’t have a chance to meet up to read today.”
Jessica could have kissed him. He wasn’t early. This was a statement and she needed to take heed of what was being said. This wasn’t the place that Jessica Tingles could make a mark and show herself to be more than what she was.
