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I glance at him sharply. “A reckoning? Don’t think I’ve already been reckoned with? Don’t you think I’ve already paid the price when I lost her? I wasgoodwhen I still had a daughter.”
“You were never good, Ramsay,” he says gruffly. “Neither was I. How could we have been with where we came from?”
“So then the reckoning is for the sins of the father,” I grumble. “I still think I’ve paid my fair share of the price.”
I pay the price every morning when I wake up and realize Hilla is gone.
“We can’t keep doing this forever.”
“But we can,” I tell him adamantly, trying to escape this sinking feeling inside me, like I’m being tied down with bricks. “Wecando this forever. There’s no other life for us, Thane. How could there be? We are safest here, together. We don’t belong in the old world or the new, so we have to create one of our own. This is our home.”
He gives his head a shake while gnawing on his lip. “It’s no place to raise a child.”
“It’s the only place to raise your child. That’s why our father did it with us.”
“And he made us into this. Into killers. Into—”
“Into men of fortune, doing what they have to do to survive,” I interrupt him. “This life we chose, this ship, this crew, we’re doing what we can to live another day. I’ll admit that maybe the senseless killings have gone too far and my bloodlust gets the best of me and maybe it doesn’t have to be that way. Maybe I need to be reined in before I become a real madman. But this is the only life, the only path, that lets us be who we really are. I won’t give that all up for a life on land where society would destroy us, not in a million years.”
He sighs heavily, running his hand down his face. “It’s a rousing speech but I’ve heard it all before. It’s time you remember to use it on the crew. It’s been a while since they’ve had any purpose. You need to give them a purpose, Ramsay, or there will be a mutiny on your hands and I don’t think I’m important enough to them to stop it.”
The word mutiny is a kick in the gut. “Who is talking mutiny? Sterling?”
Sterling has always been throwingthatword around, ever since he was demoted from first mate to gunner, after I had taken control of theNightwindwhen my father was killed. He wanted to become captain, not me. Suffice to say, his attempt for control didn’t go well. I don’t trust him and if this were any other ship and I was any other pirate, he would be gone. But Sterling is a part of the Brethren and for now, he stays.
“Not that I know. And not anyone in particular. Just a feeling.”
“Did your ball show you this?”
He manages to grin. “My balls show me lots of things.”
I laugh at that, about to point out that his sense of humor may be immature but at least it’s present, when suddenly Drakos shouts from the crow’s nest above.
“Navy ship! Three hundred yards portside!”
CHAPTER8
Maren
If I were a proper lady,I probably would have been insulted that Aerik and I were being treated like caged animals, but when the quiet pirate with the dark menacing stare and calm movements came to collect our bucket of waste and replace it with a clean one, I was nothing but grateful. It was starting to smell awful and any sense of humility disappeared long ago.
But Aerik, despite his dislocated arm, decided to provoke the pirate who reacted swiftly with a knife to Aerik’s cheek. Luckily he left just a scratch but the pirate seemed to enjoy it a little too much.
“Bastard,” Aerik says under his breath as he wipes the blood from his cheek and the pirate leaves the room. This time he doesn’t close the door, leaving us with some light to see by.
Maybe if you weren’t filled with so much foolish pride you wouldn’t get as banged up as you are, I think to myself, staying silent on the matter. I know the captain threatened him with more harm if he laid a hand on me, but since Aerik doesn’t seem to learn from his mistakes, I’m not taking a chance.
With the door open now we hear the pirate that was just in the room with us go elsewhere on this deck and start talking to other pirates which he addresses as the “gunmen.” Something about being ready if the situation arises.
Suddenly the ship erupts with shouts from above deck, very different than the screams we’ve been hearing on and off from the hold. This one reeks of panic and for a moment I’m feeling hopeful. If they’re panicking, it means there’s been another ship spotted, an enemy, and with any luck it’s some sort of authority. Whether they were sent to rescue us or sent to take down the pirates, our freedom might be moments away.
Aerik glances at me, his fingers pressed against his cheek. “What do you think that is?” he asks. “Are we under attack?”
“It might be our rescue.”
For a moment the anger fades from his eyes and they’re filled with hope instead and he looks very much like the boy I fell in love with ten years ago. Back then he was softer. A fool still, brash and selfish, but I honestly did love him and I know he did love me. It’s just that Edonia never mentioned how human love can wear many disguises and can change over the years, becoming sour and corrupt as spoiled milk.
BANG!
