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I snarl at him, hoping that tooth comes back like it would when I was a full Syren. I’m still not sure how my body is working, it seems that my claws and teeth only come out when I’m enraged and ready to fight, and that my gills only detach from my neck when I’m underwater. Still, my vanity hopes that I didn’t lose an actual human tooth for good. Funny how you can worry about such frivolous things when your life is on the line.
All I know is that I can’t end up like those skeleton Syrens. Is it Nerissa that passes the curse onto me, or is it the crew themselves? Is it the ship?
The questions have me panicking and trying to battle my way through the crew on the boat every couple of seconds until a bunch of them have to sit on me to keep me in place and one ties ropes around my wrists and ankles, binding me the same way Ramsay once did.
Fortunately, I have something now that I didn’t then and that’s sharp teeth. I start gnawing away at the ropes, making progress so that I’m almost free by the time I’m hauled up on the deck of their ship like a freshly caught shark.
Until one of them notices what I’m doing and they run around trying to find a solution, which comes in the form of an actual rusted chain being shoved between my teeth and fastened at the back of my head like a gag.
I scream, the sound gargled by the chain but high enough still to make them cover their ears. Rust flakes off into my tongue, making my whole mouth salivate at the metallic taste and I start coughing hard.
No. This can’t be my fate, after every single thing I’ve been through.
I refuse to submit to it.
With a bellow I pull up from my lungs, I start fighting them the best that I can, thrashing around, smashing their bodies with mine until their bones break. I have a lot of meat on my bones and they have none.
This is all Ramsay’s fault, I decide.He could have just let me go instead of making me run.
But whether that thought is true or not it’s the last one that I have before something hits me over the head and the world goes dark.
* * *
I wake up to someone shaking my shoulder.
My eyes slowly flicker open, wincing at the bright light coming in through a window. Blood pumps noisily in my head, my brain feeling like it’s too big for my skull and my mouth is aching from being wedged open with the rusted chain.
I groan and try to move my head to see who’s shaking me, letting out a sharp gasp of pain when my head feels like it’s been shaken to pieces.
A kind smiling face looks down at me.
Sedge!
Except once I see past the familiar soft eyes and rounded chin, I realize that he’s already been inflicted by the curse. Parts of his face are peeling off, revealing jawbone and teeth underneath, and whatever skin is left is stretched tight across his face.
“Oh, Sedge,” I say to him, lifting up my bound hands to touch his shoulder, too afraid I might do further damage to his face. “Did they get to you already?” Of course, he can’t quite understand what I’m saying with this chain in my mouth, but he seems adept at reading people.
He gives me a sympathetic smile and raises his hands. I see that they are bound too, skin being flayed from the ropes at the wrist. He may only be human, but he’s a big man and I have no doubt he tried to do some real damage to the crew.
Where are we?I think, looking around carefully so that my head doesn’t explode from the pain. There’s a small porthole window and that’s it. The room is narrow and empty except for the two of us.
I manage to get to my feet and hop over to the closed door, the ropes tight around my ankles. I try the handle but naturally it’s locked. No doubt Sedge would have tried to break it down before he decided it was no use.
When I look back he’s shaking his head to tell me not to bother. There’s a look about him that I hate, one that seems resigned to his fate now.
I can’t think that way.
“Listen,” I say to him, trying to speak as clearly as possible even with the metal in my mouth and my throat parched. “We are going to find a way out of here. I know you want to give up, but you mustn’t. I have put up with too much for far too long to just wave the white the flag and surrender. We aren’t going to stop until the both of us are free, alright?”
I worry he didn’t understand a word of my mushed speech but a look comes across his tired face. I’ve seen that look before. Ramsay looks at me like that sometimes, like he’s both amused and in awe.
“I know I’m stubborn,” I add. “But the fight in me isn’t over.”
He nods, even though I can tell he doesn’t share my optimism.
And it’s not that I’m obtusely optimistic. I’m aware of what’s at stake here. I understand the fate that is laid out for me by the gods. I know that the chances of us getting out of here alive are low, not to mention further unscathed, but I don’t have a choice. If I sit back and submit, I’ll die hating myself. I’ve spent too much of my life hating myself for the mistakes and choices I made in my past, repeatedly beating myself up over the same moments. It’s time for me to forgive the girl that I was and accept the path that my life has taken, no matter how hard it’s been. We can’t go back and fix what was, but we can use it to make sure those mistakes don’t happen again.
And I will never hide who I am or betray my true spirit.
