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I nod. “Really. Now put that bitch out of your mind. She’s just fucking jealous.”
She smiles at me. “You’re making it hard,” she says.
My brows knit together. “What hard?”
“Keeping you at arm’s length. I’ve been trying real hard to stop myself from falling for you again. But it’s impossible.”
I grin. “Good.” I don’t want her holding back. Not anymore. I want everything from her. I have given her time and been at her side throughout it all. Now I want her to give me all of her.
“You’re an ass,” she snaps, her eyes flashing with heat and a little anger, but her lips are twisting into a smile.
My grin widens. Fucking finally. She’s snapping back, giving me back her sass.
“So what you’re saying,” I begin and watch as her eyes narrow, “is that you love me?”
“I want dessert,” she sighs. “I saw chocolate cake.”
Yes. She fucking loves me. She’s just not ready to admit it yet. That’s okay. We have the rest of our lives for her to do so.
THIRTY-ONE
TEAGAN
My head is pounding as Lena speaks. “Tell me about how things are with Elio?” It’s been over an hour, and we’ve gone through so much already. I’m not sure if I can talk about more. “How are things between the two of you?”
I press my fingers against my temples and rub in circles, hoping to ease the pain. “Good,” I reply with a smile. “Last night, we went on a date. Things are starting to feel as they should, you know?”
She nods. “You’re starting to feel like a married couple rather than him being your carer?”
We’ve spoken at length about how I feel with Elio taking care of me since I tried to end my life. I hate the fact that he put his life on hold because of where I was mentally and physically. I felt as though he was my carer, but last night, I felt like his wife, and it was an amazing feeling.
“Yes, I dressed up and we went to dinner at a restaurant. It was my first date, and it was amazing.” It felt like a dream come true, and I was beyond happy. Probably the happiest I’ve ever felt in my life.
“Talk to me about what happened when you returned home,” Lena says, leaning forward, a pen between her fingers, eagerly awaiting my answer.
“I kissed him,” I confess. “It was only a soft one, but he deepened it.” I felt it in my toes. It was by far the best kiss of my life. “But then he pulled back.”
She nods. “How did you feel when you were kissing?”
“Like the world melted away and it was just him and I. I didn’t want it to stop. I was hungry for him.” I shake my head, my cheeks rising with heat. I sound stupid.
She grins. “And when he pulled back, how did that make you feel?”
“Sad, disappointed, a little worried.”
She frowns deeply, the pen bouncing between her fingers. “Worried?”
I nod. “Like maybe I did something wrong, and that’s why he stopped.”
Understanding flickers through her eyes. “Maybe it could have been that he didn’t want to push you. He knows what you’ve been through. Teagan, that was a huge step opening up to him, letting him see the secrets that you buried deep inside of you. It could just be that he didn’t want you to feel forced into doing anything you don’t want to.”
I pick at my nails. “I want him,” I confess. “I want him to hold me while we make love. I want to feel him again. But I’m scared. What if he can’t? What if all he knows is to hurt?”
“Have you spoken to Elio about this?”
I shake my head. “No. How do you even ask someone that?”
“Just as you said it to me, say it to him. A marriage is about trust and being able to communicate openly. For you and Elio to get to the next step, you have to be honest. Telling him what you want is a huge factor in that, Teagan.”
