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“In a way that only a sixteen-year-old could. He was my one bright spot in a bleak world. Santos was still raping me, and each time he was becoming more and more violent. I honestly thought I was going to die before I ever made it to the wedding. I almost hoped I did. Dorian was the only thing that pulled me through, but it was all a game. A test I was destined to fail.”
“What did he do?”
I huff and play with the hem of my shirt. “He lied.”
“About what? You have to give me more than that.”
“He lied about everything. He lied about his feelings for me, lied about protecting me. He lied about everything. Everything he told me was fed to him by Santos.”
He sucks in a sharp breath. “What?”
“Santos set me up. I was getting too old for his tastes, but my sister…” I blow out a breath. “Dorian was in love with Santos. Santos, being the smart man he was, saw an opportunity and took it. He wove a story in which I became the traitor, my sister became his consolation prize, and my parents became collateral damage. When I told you he took out everyone who would remember me, it wasn’t a lie. I was just referring to me as opposed to Sophia. Though why he kept Dorian alive, especially after the charade of faking his death, I don’t know, unless he needed him for something else. In the end, keeping Dorian alive is what saved Santos’ life.
“The day you came for me was the last day of freedom I tasted in over a year. Santos threw me in his dungeon and let his men do whatever they wanted to me.”
I hear a ragged breath, but it isn’t from Calix. I tense, but when Rémy bends and lifts me, settling me in his lap, I relax a fraction. Maxim sits on the other side of me and takes my free hand while Calix continues to grip the other.
“Finish your story, Sugar. We’ve got you,” Rémy murmurs into my hair.
“I lost all sense of time. Life was just pain and more pain. The days blended into each other, and I’ll admit, I spaced out a lot. Reality was something just out of my reach until he raped Sophia. I think he wanted to do things differently with her, you know? He gave her everything her heart desired, didn’t lay a finger on her for a whole year, instead he took his frustrations out on me. But it’s impossible to keep the monster leashed forever, and eventually, he snapped.”
I start shaking as I come to the next part of the story, causing Rémy to hold me tighter. “You don’t have to carry on.”
“I do. I have to get it out.”
Calix presses a kiss on my shoulder.
“He branded her and raped her while his men pinned me to the floor and made me watch. I saw the light in her eyes die. She didn’t scream, didn’t fight, she was just gone, and Santos was pissed. I’ve never seen him like that before.”
“He punished her for it,” Maxim says softly.
I shake my head, feeling my tears fall. “No. He carried her out of there like she was precious cargo. Took her to his boat so he could make her his wife. He punished me instead. Had his men hold me and made me watch them rape my mother over and over before they slit her throat. All while reminding me that it was my fault.”
“I’m sorry. Fuck. If I’d have been there—”
“You’d be dead. You became a liability the first time you stood up for me. Be grateful that he only removed you from the board instead of eliminating you altogether.”
I lean back into Rémy and feel the steady beat of his heart. I use it to ground me as I carry on. “After my mother was dead, I thought they’d get bored and leave. Most did, but two of them stayed. They drugged my dad,” I whisper. “Made him have sex with my mom’s body. And then… Then they turned him on me. I couldn’t do it anymore. I just couldn’t. When one of them was leaning over me, I grabbed his gun and shot them both. Then I shot my dad in the head.” I sob as Rémy rocks me. “He couldn’t come back from that. Nobody could.”
“It was an act of mercy,” Rémy tells me.
“I am not God.”
“No, but you’re a goddamn miracle,” Maxim snarls. “Look at you. Look at what you survived. I am in fucking awe of you, baby.”
“Finish up now so we can take you home and love you.”
Despite it all, I chuckle at Calix’s words. I take a deep breath and wipe the tears from my eyes. “I shut down after that. I remember moving through the house, killing every guard I came across, then finding a can of gasoline and dousing the place. I lit a match and set fire to the house before making my way down to the marina.
“I could see the boat. It was sitting out near the buoys. Two speedboats were heading back to shore, so I hid under the dock. One of them held the heads of four of the five families. The other carried Andrew Kypianos, who looked like he wanted to commit murder, and a priest who was muttering about forgiveness. I waited for them to leave—it felt like I waited forever. Once everyone was gone, I took one of the boats and headed toward Santos’s boat. I stopped halfway and swam the rest. I was so weak; I didn’t think I’d make it. If it had been anyone else on that boat, I would have given up and let the ocean swallow me, but I couldn’t leave her there.”
“So fucking brave. So determined. I’m so proud of you, angel,” Calix whispers.
“Don’t be. I’m not.”
“Well, you should be,” Maxim states.
I look at him. “I killed her.”
