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Plus, there’s no way her first time’s going to be up against the fucking wall or spilling all the wrong shit all over the floor.
Avah deserves . . . I don’t know. A bed?
What I want to say is the whole romantic works, but I’m not that guy and call me a fucking sleaze, but I know I’m taking it from her. That stupid virginity. I’m going to mark her, stamp her mine, make her unable to see straight, and walk wrong for a week. I want to leave her knowing what good sex is. I want her to crave me.
Even when we part ways.
Because that will happen.
Our conversation in the car told me that.
She wants a world I’m not part of, and I can’t be part of hers. I’m not built for whatever the fucking picket fences painted white scenario she’s got in her head.
“Fine.”
She turns and I catch Avah’s elbow as she nearly careens into a tray of solution. “Careful,Tesoro,” I say and meet her gaze. “Can we get out of here yet?”
“Yes,” Avah hisses the word.
I open the door and step out, blinking in the bright light. In the room, she’s moving about, banging stuff. I go, reach in, and pull her out, pinning her against the wall, caging her head with my hands on either side.
“You’re a real fucking brat, Avah. Did I mention I’m not above meting out punishment? A good spanking for bad little girls?”
I’m playing with real fire here. Saying things I shouldn’t, going hot to cold and back to hot again.
But fuck it’s hard not to touch her. “You . . . you kiss me like that and reject me. You lie to me, you—”
“I might be omitting a few things.” I stare down at her. She’s both right and wrong about me lying by omission. I guess I’m a criminal if you want to view it that way, but there are so many legit criminals out there that what I do is way more honest.
It’s not because I can’t trust her or she can’t handle it, but because she hates my world. Security is my job—a big part of it. I protect what belongs to the De Luca family, I enforce it. Often with a fuck ton of prejudice.
Avah grew up in a world like that, but she isn’t front and center in it and what she knows she hates.
So, security.
“I carry a gun. I own guns. My job is often dangerous. But I do security. And that’s not important. I’m here with you because I choose to be.” It’s true. I don’t need to take time off and try and balance my world and the demands of my job to protect her. I could have just extracted her and returned her to Daddy.
But here we are.
“I’m not fucking you in a damn makeshift darkroom. Not for your first time.” There’s something that’s very much horror on her face and I don’t know if she remembers telling me that, so I add, “For us.”
“You want to?”
Oh, dear fucking God. That unsure innocence, the lack of confidence. The woman is spectacular, and I’m not sure she understands exactly how much of a stunner she is. I lift a hand, grab hers, and push it onto my hard on that’s having a really difficult time deflating with her right here.
“Feel that?”
Her fingers curl instinctively around it through my trousers, and it’s like lightning. As I think I said, she’s enough to put me in danger of coming—literally—in my pants.
“That right there, Avah, is how much I want you. Right now, you’d run away at the filthy perversions in my head. If you could see all the things I want to do to you.”
Her fingers tighten as she blinks, and my cock gets even harder. “Like what?”
Like fuck her ass, like fuck her skull, like slam into that cunt so hard, she sees stars. I want to have her on her knees, take her from behind. I want her feet on my shoulders. I want to spank her and finger her and go down on her. I want to pervert her, worship her, call her my slut. I want to make her my own personal whore. I want everything there is. I want nothing between us but sweat-slicked skin and bodily fluids.
I want.
As I said. I want to be as filthy and nasty as I can.
