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“Neither did you.”
A blanket of silence engulfed us, but it wasn’t unpleasant.
Oliver was the one to break the quiet, but I wasn’t surprised. He had always been braver than me. “You were the first guy I thought was sexy.” He wasn’t interested in mincing words. “I had always been, I don’t know, interested in you - since middle school. I thought you were cool. You were always working on the cars with your dad, and you had so many friends. You were different than the people I went to school with, but you had always been beside me. When I went to college I just assumed that feeling would go away, but every time I saw you on breaks it would come back. And it started to feel…different.” He sighed, looking down at his feet. “I…I masturbated to you, once, and that made everything more real.”
I chuckled. “Yeah? Well, I’ve masturbated to you more times than I can count.”
I watched his throat contract as he swallowed hard, but his shoulders seemed to relax. “Why didn’t you tell me? Why did you run away instead?”
“I thought you were straight. I was afraid that confessing to you would gross you out.”
He scoffed. “Even after we had sex?”
“Yeah. Even then. My body is one thing, but my heart is another.”
He rubbed at his eyes, finally free from tears. “I was so happy when we slept together the first time.” He laughed. “I felt like a teenager with a crush.”
I bit my lip. “If you knew that you liked me, why did you keep taking girls home? Why were you always making out with them in the back of the car?”
He cleared his throat. “You know Logan works at that club? The regulars invite him to parties and clubs all the time, and he would invite me. Girls and guys would be all over him, and they would come on to me too. The first time I brought a girl home, I wasn’t thinking of you. I just thought she was cute and went with it. But, on the way back, you kept looking at me in the mirror.” He shuddered. “It was like your look set me on fire. It felt like you wanted me. I slept with her, but the whole time I was imagining she was you. After that, I kept hooking up with girls to get you to look at me.”
I hit my limit. I leaned over until my head fell into his lap. He was startled at first, but then he dropped his hands onto my head. I wrapped my arms around his leg, holding him to me. “I hated it. I hated seeing you with someone else. But I didn’t think I had a chance until you tried to bring home that guy, and I snapped.”
He brushed his fingers through my hair. “I’m glad you did,” he whispered.
We stayed like that for a while, not talking, not moving. My mind should have been racing with thoughts, but it was quiet.
I could have stayed like that for hours, but Oliver’s stomach rumbled, breaking the spell. “Hungry?” I laughed.
“Starving.Someonemade me lose my appetite.”
I rose up and kissed him. He smiled, and I swear my heart skipped a beat. “I’ll see what I can do.”
He nodded and rested his head against the back of the couch. It was the first time he had been in my apartment, but he looked so right. “Can I stay the night?”
I went in for another kiss. “You can stay forever.”
Chapter Fifteen
My bed was empty when I woke. I stretched out my arm, searching for Oliver’s lingering warmth. There was none.
He had spent the night, but we had kept our hands to ourselves. It had been nice. It had taken a while, but we finally were honest with each other. We hadn’t made any plans or promises, but he had fallen asleep in my arms, and that was enough.
I squinted as the morning light snuck through my blinds. There was no sign of him. He must have gone to the bathroom.
I rolled over and kicked my feet onto the floor, debating on what breakfast to make us. Then I saw the note.
It was from the notepad I kept stuck to my fridge for reminders.
Gone to tell Dad I’m in love with you and to stop with the dates.
X Oliver
I was out of my apartment in less than five minutes. He couldn’t be serious. I had known William a long time, and I had the utmost respect for him, but that didn’t mean he was going to react well to finding out his son was in love with a man. Despite the anxiety that twisted in my stomach, there was a small, warm feeling in my chest at the words “I’m in love with you.” He had said it the night before, but it had been in the heat of the moment. If he was going to tell his dad, well, then it was hard to doubt him.
First things first, I needed to get to Williams’s office.
Chantel gave me a look as I sped by her, but she didn’t make an effort to stop me. I wasn’t sure if that was a good or bad thing.
