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“You’re driving. I’m going wherever you take me,” he said.
Not the answer I wanted. I was hoping he’d be a little more excited about the view. Or maybe it was the fact he had no idea what I wanted to discuss with him. Had to admit that over dinner, I didn’t do much talking. Most of it was Draven. I pretty much answered with a yes or no. I wasn’t a great host, but I had nothing to say at that time. Not the case any longer.
I took the right turn and headed up the long steep drive up to the top of the bluffs. It was a windy road and I needed to focus. One thing that would surely ruin our evening together was my driving us off a cliff. It would be the shortest reunion on record.
Declan said, “This road must be hell in the dark.”
“Is that your way of saying we’re not watching the sunset up here?”
“Not that I want to miss it, but no way in hell am I risking our lives for it. Not when I’m sure it’s just as beautiful from the beach below,” he said.
“You mean at the resort?” I asked.
“No. I think you and I need a little privacy. There is none of that there. I noticed several cameras set up. They say it’s for security reasons, which might be true, but I don’t like being watched.”
“Yet you don’t have an issue with going to Halifax and watching me without my knowledge or permission.” That was harsh and true.
“Ouch,” he replied.
“I don’t mean to hurt you. Just stating facts.” At the top of the hill, I pulled my car to the side of the road and shut off the engine. Turning in my seat to face him I said, “I know you had good intentions, but I still do not understand why you never let me know you were there.”
He didn’t answer right away. When he did, his voice was soft, and his gorgeous deep green eyes met mine.Damn. How is it that you are even more handsome now than you were at nineteen?The last time I had seen him he had his hair long and was clean-shaven. Now he kept his hair short and had a well-trimmed beard that made him look so distinguished.And sexy.None of these thoughts helped. It would be so easy to forget all that we needed to discuss and get lost in them. But this wasn't a date, nor a romantic outing. If we didn’t talk now, who knows, maybe we never would finish this conversation. One that needed to happen.
“Venus, I was afraid too. Not because I was going to fuck up your life, but because I cared about you. Yet you had built a life for you and your daughter that many might be envious of. I had no business stepping into it unless I was planning on staying. But I also made a life for myself in California. We were in different places in our lives. I can see how it might seem inappropriate that I came and didn’t tell you. But I was sure if I did and then left again it would be worse.”
That was something I wasn’t sure about either. It was easy for me to think about him and having him in my life. But in and out of my life most likely would’ve sucked. Just saying goodbye to him once had been difficult. I couldn't imagine doing it each year. Nothing had changed except we both were older. And since I’d brought him here to a very romantic spot, I might not be any wiser.
“Your explanation makes sense. I believe it was easier for me not to see you. You were part of my past and that was where you needed to stay,” I stated.
“Are you sorry that we crossed paths again? Do you wish I hadn’t come here to find you?” he asked.
“Is that what you did? You came here for me? Not on vacation?” I asked. He nodded. “But...but how did you know I was here? I made sure no one knew where I was going.”
“That’s a long story,” he said.
“And I’m listening,” I replied, waiting for him to explain.
“No one in Halifax would tell me anything. I was...hell, Venus, I panicked. I thought something might have happened and you needed to go on the run again. I freaked and hired a PI to find you,” he blurted out.
“You’re the one who has been looking for me?”
“Yes. I needed to know that you were okay. When Jones, he’s the PI, showed me a picture of MaKayla’s wedding, I knew where you were.”
“From the pictures?” Most of them were taken at the resort which wasn’t built when I left here. “Have you been back here since you picked me up all those years ago?”
“No. But there was one photo with the lighthouse in the background. As soon as I saw it, I knew where you were.”
I knew exactly what he was talking about. It wasn’t just a lighthouse, but almost a carving that was also a lighthouse. “The wedding was just three days ago.”
“I know.”
“And you boarded a plane and flew right here just to check on me?” I asked.
“Yes. I...I will always care about you, Venus. I always have. I couldn’t stand the thought that something might have changed, and you were no longer living the life you wanted. The life you deserved.”
And I never forgot you. I spent many nights wishing you were with me, helping me raise MaKayla.He had no idea how difficult it was for me. MaKayla didn’t have a father. All she had was me. Maybe if he’d said something, done something differently, MaKayla would’ve had a father, and I wouldn’t have felt so...alone.
“I had the life I made for myself. I still do.”
