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“No. I’m not sick. I just wanted to...get used to it. I remember how at night I would come up on deck and just lie there looking up at the night sky. It’s been so long that I couldn’t help myself. Even though it’s not night, it felt so good to lie here,” she said.
I chuckled. “Well, if we don’t get going, we’re still going to be in the harbor when it does get dark. Which is okay with me, but I have a feeling, you are not going to enjoy the stars half as much from here.”
She got up and said, “What can I do to help you?”
Since she knew nothing about sailing, it was best I did it alone. “Why don’t you go below deck and start putting a few of your things away, and I’ll get us out into the open sea?”
“Are you sure? I mean, I hate for you to have to do it all alone,” she offered again.
“I prefer it that way.” I saw the hurt in her eyes and realized that it sounded cold. “What I meant was that I am used to doing it myself. I have a checklist in my head. It’s just easier than trying to explain what I’m thinking to anyone else.”
“Oh. That makes sense. Okay. I’ll go and unpack,” she said.
I watched as she slipped below before I prepared the boat to set sail. It didn’t take long before we were on our way out of the harbor. I felt more at ease on the water than I ever did on land. If I had my way, I'd live on a boat forever. Yet owning a business, the government liked me to have a residence somewhere and not just GPS coordinates.
Venus had been below longer than I thought. We were far enough out, and no other vessels were in sight. It was safe enough for me to go and check on her. As I opened the door to the bedroom, I expected to see her still unpacking, but instead, found her fast asleep.
The ocean air had that effect on many, and if I was right, she probably didn’t get much sleep last night. I know I sure in hell didn’t. Not only had I spent hours preparing everything for our trip, but I also fully expected her to call me and tell me that she had changed her mind.
I wouldn’t have been upset in the least. Draven was right, she was coming down from an emotional high. Her only child was now married. Venus probably was doing all this just until she could redefine herself in her new life. I knew I’d be lost if I didn’t have my business to keep me distracted.
But no amount of distraction was going to prevent me from admiring how beautiful she looked sprawled out on the bed. Her long black hair covered the pillow, and her sweet lips, almost into a pout. She moaned in her sleep and stirred slightly. Was she dreaming of me?
Her moan changed into a soft cry and then I hoped her dream wasn’t about me because she seemed restless. I couldn’t leave her alone with a nightmare. Also didn’t want to startle her either. Stepping closer I sat on the edge of the bed and called her name.
“Venus. Wake up. It’s okay. It’s only a dream,” I said softly. She choked back a sob, and my heart ached. Gently, I reached out and touched her calf and said, “Venus. Wake up.” This time my voice was a little more firm.
She shook her head, then her eyes blinked open. It took a minute for her to adjust to the surroundings, but when she did, she scooted over to me and wrapped her arms tightly around me.
“Declan. Oh, God. It was just a dream,” she said.
Not sure what it was, but I’m glad I decided to come below deck. Soothing her and stroking her hair, I said, “Yes. You’re okay. It was just a nightmare.”
“The worst kind,” she said.
“About Michael?” I asked, not wanting to talk about him. He was dead and I’d rather keep any memories of him the same.
“No. Something so much worse than that. I was dreaming of MaKayla. She was on the boat with us. I was sitting looking out over the ocean and she was playing nearby. But a wave came and the boat rocked. She fell into the ocean, and I couldn’t see her. I dove in, and I...I couldn’t see her. I was calling for you to help, but the boat was sailing away, and you couldn’t hear me. We...” she sobbed. “You...didn’t know we needed you.”
I held her tightly. “Venus, it was just a dream. And I will always know when you need me. I’ll always be close.”
This was a promise that was going to be challenging to keep, but I didn’t say it lightly. Venus was crying and her tears pleaded for me to commit to her. She didn’t reply, just squeezed me back and I held her until her tears stopped.
With a jolt, she looked up at me. “Who is steering the boat?”
“Me. And I should head back up. Why don’t you get some more rest? You’re exhausted.”
She shook her head. “I’m coming with you. Rest like what I just had isn’t rest at all.”
Loosening my grip, I said, “Then come with me. The sun is just about to set.”
She held my hand as we walked back up, not yet ready to let go. The nightmare was still too fresh in her mind.
I knew it had nothing to do with the boat and everything to do with feeling the lack of control in her life. This trip was hopefully going to give her time to not just focus on what comes next but find peace in what that would be.
We sat up on the deck and watched the sun disappear on the horizon. Neither of us spoke and were just in the moment. I was sitting behind her, and she leaned back against my chest. I inhaled the scent of her shampoo. It smelled like coconuts and vanilla, or was that her lotion? Either way, she smelled delicious.
Venus stirred slightly against me, and I slipped my arms around her. She turned her head to look at me, and I couldn’t help myself. I kissed her lips so briefly, that it was over even before it began. She sighed, and turned back towards the ocean, settling in more snuggly against me.
