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He pulls his head back in. “I had a tragic experience with vomiting once. Never fully recovered from it. Back in high school, I was part of an a cappella group. We were in the middle of a performance and the girl next to me vomited all over the microphone.” He shivers. “I’ve never been the same.”
“Uh-huh.” I side-eye him, recalling the movie Kiki made us watch a few weekends ago where the exact scene played out. “Sounds vaguely familiar. I didn’t know ye were in an a cappella group.” I key in the gate code as we arrive at Kiki’s house.
“Hello? It took years to train this voice into perfection.”
TJ’s the worst singer I know, but I chuckle, because I love his confidence. “Wasn’t that vomiting scene from the movie Kiki made us watch?Pitch Perfect?”
“Oh look, we’re here!” He unsnaps his seat belt and bolts from the car before I can even turn off the engine. “Bet I can beat you to the front door, Chase!”
Chase hurtles out of the car, running to catch up to TJ. I unbuckle the remaining three and grab their bags as they clamber out of the SUV. Surveying the damage of strewn fries and half-eaten cheeseburgers on the floor, I shake my head. Ketchup is dripping down the buttery leather seat, and a few fries are mashed into the carpet from their shoes. Fucking fantastic. I clean up the best I can and drop the bags in the entry hall while the kids run off. Sarah, Kiki, and TJ are chatting in the kitchen.
“There’s Uncle Coco!” Sarah’s eyes twinkle.
“Sorry Drew threw up.” Kiki hugs my neck. “I forgot to tell you he can’t eat in the car. Thank you for cleaning him up.”
I hand her Drew’s beloved blanket, Bankie. “Ye might want to throw this in the wash.”
“Thanks for getting the kids today. TJ was telling us how the other moms had you backed into a corner. I see you made it back in one piece, clothes intact.” Sarah squeezes my bicep on her way to the fridge, taking out four juice boxes.
Kiki smiles as she shoves the blanket into a Ziploc. “Yeah, they love a tatted-up man with muscles, especially Grace.”
“Ah, yes, well”—I smirk—“as soon as they found out I was the gay dad, they backed off a smidge, but thanks fer the heads-up.”
“Ooh, ooh, speaking of gay dads, guess who’s on board!” TJ jumps in place.
“TJ,” I warn.
“Really? Congrats, you guys! I’m so glad you talked it over.” Sarah wraps me in a hug. “I think you’ll make an excellent dad.”
“Remember, I called dibs on being their godmother.” Kiki bops TJ on the nose with her finger before he can push her away. “Connor, I hope you said no to the name Bartie.” She snorts and then her eyes bulge. “Shit, I hope that’s not an Irish family heirloom name. Oh god, it is, isn’t it? Why else would you want such an antiquated name that would scar your child for life? I mean, it’s a lovely name—”
“Kiki.” TJ motions for her to zip it. She sinks back against the counter, her cheeks red.
“Did you get the film guys to record it?” Sarah asks.
“Wait, ye two’ve known about this?” I ask, incredulously.
“I mean, we’ve talked about it…” Kiki’s eyes jump to TJ. “Briefly mentioned it this morning…casually in passing, really. Like we high-fived in the hall and I said you guys should be dads. It was seriously not a big production. Not like binders with ‘Baby Ryan’ bedazzled on them in rhinestones were passed around. Right, Sare?” Kiki gulps her coffee while TJ motions for her to shut up by slicing his finger over his throat.
“You are the worst at this,” he hisses.
I try to simmer my temper. I’m annoyed he conversed with them about it before me. “Done ye think we should have talked about it before gabbin’ to the girls?”
Sarah tips her head at Kiki. “Let’s give these two some privacy.”
“We’ll be in the family room with the kids.” Kiki grabs the juice boxes and they quickly exit the kitchen.
I spin on TJ before he has a chance to disappear. “I can’t believe you, Thomas.”
“What?” he whines, sitting down at the island.
“I put up with a lot. Lord knows I do, but done ye think we should have discussed this first before telling my sister-in-law that we’re goin’ to try to adopt? This wasn’t even on my radar until an hour ago. She’s gonna tell Lex and it will get back to my mom, and you know how crazy she gets.”
“Oh, Maggie will be over the moon when we tell her we’re going to adopt or hire a surrogate, which is the route I’d like to…” He trails off when his eyes take in my stiff posture and clenched hands. “Of course, you’re right. You’re absolutely right. I’m so sorry. I’m just excited for us to take the next step. To have a family. I think you’ll be an incredible dad and I could dress him in the cutest suspenders and newsboy hat and we’ll name him Bartholomew—Bartie, for short.”
Heaving a sigh, I pinch my nose in frustration. “TJ, it’s more than dressing them in cute clothes, although by yer description, yer already settin’ him up to get bullied at school. They aren’t something fun for ye to parade around. It’s a lifetime commitment. We’re raisin’ ahuman being, not a French bulldog. And there’s no way in hell we’re calling ourbabóg, Bartie.” I shove my hands in my hair and walk in a circle, tryin’ to stay calm. How did this spin out of control so quickly? One minute I’m picking up my niece and nephew, and the next I’m being pigeon-holed into having one of our own. I want kids someday, but not today.
TJ’s forlorn expression gives me pause.Stop thinking about yourself, Connor. He must really want this. I step over to him and place my hands on his thighs. Wordlessly, I bend down and kiss his pouty lips.
