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And lived with his mother.
I laughed, and my own bitter laughter echoed back at me from the tile walls. At least the hot water felt good. I spun the knob to the right, getting it as hot as I could stand it, then stood beneath the spray for a good five minutes, willing it to wash away every last memory of my shitty date.
Ten minutes later I was laying in bed, warm and cozy and wholly awake.
Shit.
It was too late to do anything, but too early to be tired. I supposed I could get up and watch TV. I could sit at my computer and study. Or…
Or you could do something tomakeyourself tired.
My mouth curled into a bit of a secret smile.
Something fun.
Derrik had been just a drop in the bucket of cataclysmically bad dates I’d gone on lately. I’d only started dating again last month, after a six-month dry spell, but it seemed that while I’d been away every real man in the world just up and disappeared. All that was left were the cocksure, Tinder-surfing assholes who thought they were God’s gift to women. And of course the Peter Pan twenty-somethings still living in Neverland who steadfastly refused to grow up.
I pushed both categories out of my mind as my hand slid slowly down my stomach. By the time my fingertips pierced the delicate waistband of my panties, I was already calling up visions of insanely-ripped alpha gods, hell-bent on pushing their way between my thighs and pounding me into oblivion. Plundering my willing body like some long-sought treasure.
Biceps the size of grapefruit floated to mind alongside broad, beautiful chests. Flat, six-pack stomachs and shoulders so thick and tall I could barely fit my ankles over them.
I sighed breathlessly, gliding a single finger through my furrow. The images were vague, the visuals fleeting. As fun as it was to build an anonymous stud in my mind, he was still simply that: anonymous.
No, I needed real life experiences to call upon. True sensory overload, from the most butterfly-inducing moments in my life that actually happened.
A small groan escaped my lips as I applied a little pressure. I had some decent boyfriends, some of which were very good in the sack. Ethan, for one. His kisses set me on fire, much the same way Duncan’s talented hands melted every part of my body he ever touched. There was Chase’s heart-stopping green eyes. Adam’s big arms, and beautifully-stubbled face.
Tyler’s… equipment.
Oh God, yes! I’d almost forgotten about Tyler!
And heavy equipment at that.
My legs parted, as my palm slid further down. Tyler had been the complete package. Tall, dark, roguishly handsome. He was built like the quintessential all-American quarterback, with fierce blue eyes that made it look like he could conquer anything, and a bright beautiful smile that told you he loved the whole world.
And yeah, it certainly didn’t hurt that he was hung like a stallion.
I’d met Tyler on a girls’ ski weekend, and the chemistry had been instant. Our casual hookup had blossomed into a full-blown relationship, and he’d been an amazing boyfriend for just over a year. Up until…
What the hell happened again?
Honestly, I couldn’t even remember. It wasn’t like we’d grown apart. I’d dated him between my freshman and sophomore years of college. There’d even been lots of back and forth, with one of us always visiting the other.
Oh yeah. You thought the grass was greener on the other side of the fence.
I stopped for a moment, as my eyes fluttered open. Damn, seriously? Was that really it? I got cold feet and backed my way out of a perfectly great relationship, all because I wanted to see what else was out there?
Yup.
“Well shit,” I said aloud. “I’m a complete idiot.”
Anger swirled, along with a deep disappointment. I couldn’t even get myself off properly! And yet…
Tyler’s still here. Still in town.
I bolted upright. The thought hadn’t even occurred to me. I’d been back in Northhold for almost a year, and I hadn’t even thought to look him up.
Much lesshookup.
