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“Honey,” Darcy drawled. “Don’t know how to break this to you, but I’m pretty sure Viper intends to keep you.”
Chapter24
Keep me?
I wasn’t a dog. I couldn’t be kept.
What did that even mean?
The Old Ladies, including Willa, left quickly after Darcy had made that pronouncement. It was like they wanted to give me time to myself to stew over her words.
I wasn’t a stewer by nature. I didn’t sit and think about things deeply or for a long period of time. In fact, I believed I was the opposite of a stewer…which I guess meant I was adoer. I leapt before I looked, sometimes landing in hot water, sometimes not.
It wasn’t for lack of impulse control; I just didn’t like to deliberate. When I knew something needed to be done, I acted. Maybe it was a form of resilience, of needing to be in control of my life. Even if I made a bad decision—a wrong decision—no one could ever accuse me of regret.
Regrets were a waste of time.
It was why I’d had no qualms about jumping into bed with Viper. Sure, from an outsider’s perspective, it seemed like a foolish decision. I hadn’t known him long.
But you could spend your entire life with someone and still not truly know them.
Viper had made me feel things I’d never felt before. Sexually, definitely, but it was more than that.
Maybe I belonged in the biker-club world. Maybe around these people I wouldn’t be judged for what I’d done…
As I thought about the club, I wondered if I’d grown to accept a mundane life before meeting them. Living in a trailer, taking the bus to and from work. Spending my days running errands or doing laundry. Filling my time with monotonous, meaningless tasks. There was no one to blame for my life turning out the way it had. My childhood had been rough. So what? A lot of people had the same experience, or worse. I wasn’t unique. I wasn’t special. I was just another pleb the world had chewed up and spat out.
What would my life look like if I decided to stick around the club?
Is that really what Viper wants?
They were criminals. You didn’t get involved in a cartel war unless you were a criminal yourself. But criminals came in all shapes and sizes.
Some wore leather.
Some wore suits.
The world was a cruel place, and I was starting to believe that if you wanted anything good in your life, you had to be the one to go after it. You had to take chances, live your life to the fullest and never stop until you took what was rightfully yours.
But I hadn’t been doing that. I’d been living small. Small and scared. It was easier to live small and scared. But the truth of it was that if I wanted my dreams to come true, I had to make them happen.
But whatweremy dreams? Did I even have any? Sure, I was enjoying my time with Viper, but then what? What would a future look like with him? What would a future look like without him?
“Stop, stop, stop,” I muttered, tapping my third eye.
The Old Ladies could believe whatever they wanted, but Viper and I were not going to go the distance.
“Ugh, stop being such a sappy girl.”
I needed to get out of the clubhouse. More importantly, I needed to get away from my own thoughts.
There were two men at the gates who I still hadn’t officially met, and since there was no one else around, I decided to befriend them.
I went to the fridge and pulled out two bottles of water before I headed outside. I approached them, waters held out in front of me in silent offering.
“Thanks,” one of the guys said after he’d downed half a bottle.
“Yeah,” the other added. “That was nice of you.”
