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The server returned with our beers, and I hastily pulled my hand from Viper’s and set it in my lap.
“You ready to order?” the server asked.
“I didn’t look at the menu yet,” I said. “But I’m starving and if I don’t eat, I’ll become hangry and mean.”
“Well, we definitely don’t want that,” the server said.
“You go first,” I said to Viper.
I hastily perused the menu while Viper ordered.
When he was finished, I said, “I’ll have the buffalo burger, medium rare, with cheddar, lettuce, tomato, no onions, and a side of sweet potato fries, please. Oh. And a house salad with bleu cheese dressing.”
“Very good. I’ll get that going for you right away.” The server disappeared and I looked at Viper, who was shaking his head and smiling.
“What?” I demanded. “What’s that smile for?”
“You ordered a salad. That shit fucking kills me.”
“I also order it with bleu cheese dressing, so it negates any and all healthy stuff.”
Viper grabbed his pint and took two huge swallows before setting it aside.
“So, Rhett,” I began. “Can I call you Rhett?”
“Absolutely not.”
“What’s your middle name?”
“Haven’t got one.”
“How old are you?”
“Thirty-six. You want to know my blood type, too?”
“Nah, that feels kind of invasive.”
“Now you,” he commanded.
“Sutton Eloise Woods. I’m twenty-two.”
He ran a hand down his face. “Christ.”
“What?”
“Nothing.”
“Not nothing.”
“You’re just…young.”
“Yeah, I guess.” I frowned.
“I’m too old for you.”
“You lost me.”
“You and me. We’re never going to happen.”
