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The call goes straight to voicemail.
I slam my hand against the steering wheel, and Kate flinches beside me.
“Fuck!” I yell, dropping my phone onto my lap.
“What can I do?” Kate whispers. “How can I help?”
“I dunno. I dunno what to do. If Rowdy saw her leave, she’s probably pissed, but…” I scrub my hand over my face again, defeat settling into my bones. “I dunno. What if it wasn’t her? Maybe Rowdy got it wrong. He hasn’t seen her in a couple of years now. But if it was her?” I scrub my hand over my face. “Shit.”
“I can try calling her if you want. To make sure she’s okay. Or would it be weird? If Hazel did recognize me, it’s not like she’ll answer, but it’s not like I’ve called her on the phone to chat before tonight, either, so…”
“We should leave it,” I decide. “I’ll call her again in a few. Send her a text. Try to explain everything. But…”
“But, what?” Her touch is gentle as she reaches over and squeezes my thigh. Like she doesn’t want to push. Yet, she also doesn’t want me to feel alone. And I’m surprised by how much I need it. Her touch. Her presence. I’ve been dealing with this shit alone for so long I almost forgot what it was like to have a partner. Even before Summer and I divorced, we weren’t partners. We were…roommates. Cohabitating. Sharing the responsibilities of the household. But I stopped feeling anything for her, and she stopped feeling anything for me long before the lottery. I think it’s why I didn’t care when she left.
But Kate? If she got out of my car right now and left me, I’m not sure I could handle it. The idea sobers me.
“I’m sorry she saw us, Mack.”
“Guess I’m just surprised,” I mutter, admitting the truth.
“Surprised by what?”
“By her response. She left. She cared enough to leave in the first place. The girl hasn’t had a conversation with me lasting more than a couple texts in two years, but she was so hurt by seeing me she left.” I rub at my temple, lost in thought. “I dunno what to think about it.”
“You’re her dad, Mack. I’m not sure theseeing youpart spooked her. I think the whole seeing you with someone other than her mother did the trick.”
I frown, mulling it over and shaking my head. “Why would she care? Summer left me, Kate. Not the other way around.”
“Still,” Kate argues. “It had to have brought up some mixed emotions. Especially after the gossip train from your ex and how she made you sound to Hazel and Miley from the last time we were seen together. It’s probably confusing.”
“Yeah.” I close my eyes and hang my head. I’m so fucking exhausted. Exhausted by my past. Exhausted by the desire to have a relationship with my daughters while maintaining one with the woman beside me.
“What are you thinking?” Kate whispers.
“I feel guilty, but I don’t know why.”
“Maybe you should reach out again. Tell her you love her, you miss her, and you’d love to meet up so you can explain things?”
“Yeah.” I nod, pull up the limited conversations I’ve had with Hazel via text, then type a message.
Me
Hey, Haze. Heard you were at Rowdy’s tonight. Wish you would’ve said hello. I miss you and want to introduce you to someone. Or not, if you’re not ready. I hate to see you hurting. I wasn’t trying to keep my relationship from you or anything. I didn’t know…
I sigh, delete the last sentence, and press send.
“Do you want me to call Ash or Mia or someone else and get a ride?” Kate offers. “So you can maybe stop by Summer’s house and see if Hazel went home?”
“I don’t want to corner her,” I mutter, staring at the screen, hoping to find a response. Hell, I’d even take the little blue dots hinting Hazel’s typing something. But nothing happens.
Nothing.
With a sigh, I set my phone in the cupholder.
“What can I do?” Kate questions, her breath swirling in the cold air. “How can I help?”
Her hand is still on my thigh, and I grab it, bringing her cool fingertips to my lips, and blow my warm breath against them.
