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He lifts his body, more color in his cheeks now his equilibrium has settled. “When have I ever said no to you, Tink?”
I think back on what he’s saying and realize he doesn’t. If I want it, Beck finds a way to give it to me, he always has. “You’re right, I’m sorry.” I want to reach out and kiss him, but I can’t so I stick to rubbing his back in comfort.
“It’s fine. I like seeing you both smile like this.”
His grin encompasses Xander who is quiet as he watches us. He’s relaxed more as the day has gone on and I love seeing him have fun like this. This day together, even though it’s in public, is what we needed. It’s what normal couples do, but we aren’t normal in any way.
“How about I go get us some drinks and food?”
“I’ll come with you.”
Xander stands and I wave him off. “I can manage. Stay with Beck.”
Beck gives me a hard look, which I find stupidly sexy, and says, “Take Xander with you. I won’t have you carrying everything on your own.”
Xander walks toward me and takes my hand and I give Beck one last look before we walk toward one of the food stands selling tacos and churros.
“Will he be okay?”
I smile up at Xander, trying to ignore the people around us who are staring. “Yeah, he always gets like this.”
“Then why did he go on the ride?”
“Because Beck is stubborn and hates the idea of being weak, so he tries to power through and sometimes you just can’t.”
“I feel bad now for helping you convince him.”
I put my hands on my hips. “Oh, please, he loved every second of what we did to him.”
Xander wraps an arm around me and pulls me in close to his hard body. “Yeah, he did.”
I can’t help the giggle that springs from my lips. Today has been wonderful, despite Beck feeling slightly sick. His head descends and Xander kisses me deep as I run my fingers up his chest and tangle them in his hair. A groan erupts from him when I moan in pleasure. This man kisses like the devil himself is in charge. He never holds back, always showing me how he feels and not caring who sees. It makes me sad that he can’t share that with Beck.
He pulls away and looks at me with longing, as if he might say something and is stopping himself.
“What?”
“Did you mean what you said back there, about one day being pregnant with one of our babies or was it a throwaway comment?”
I consider what he’s asking me, noting the serious expression, and know I can only be honest with my thoughts and feeling. I can’t control others around me but this I can do. “I mean, I want kids one day and this isn’t a stepping-stone relationship for me. So yeah, why not? Don’t you want children?” I hadn’t considered that, especially after watching him with Isaac. If Xander in tights and a cape is hot, then Xander holding a baby in his arms is next level. I’m pretty sure I ovulated on the spot when I saw it, it was that intense.
“I do, I just wasn’t sure you felt the same way, especially with, you know.” He shrugs and I know he’s talking about the elephant in the room and it pains him.
“That won’t be forever, though. This is your last movie in the franchise, right?” He nods slowly and something about his demeanor seems off. “Right?”
Xander scratches his chin, and it’s a nervous thing he does when he feels unsure. “Maybe. Len is in talks for a spin-off.”
I step back in surprise, and he keeps his hand on my hip. “Oh. I didn’t know.”
“We only talked about it this week.”
“I thought you wanted to do something else. Move away from action movies.”
“I did, I do, but it’s not as easy as that.”
I don’t respond because we’re in a relationship, and this feels like something we should have discussed, at the least because it affects us all. Disappointment hangs over me, and I wonder if perhaps we’re not all on the same page. I’ve been acting like this is working toward forever, when maybe for Xander it isn’t. Does Beck know this, does he feel the same way? Am I just a fun experiment for them before they each find the one and settle down? I know Beck loves me but is that just lust on top of the way he already loves me as his best friend?
Suddenly everything seems fragile, and I don’t like it.
