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‘You did,’ I insisted. ‘You were right here.’
‘Then where’s the necklace?’
I couldn’t answer that, and I felt so stupid.
Kitty looked sympathetic. ‘You’ll remember in a minute. Don’t worry.’
‘Yes,’ Sasha said. ‘Don’t worry.’ But I could see that she was concerned.
I went hunting for it, trying to remember where I might have put it. I checked all my other safe places but there was no sign of it. I was so ashamed of my memory lapse and the fact that I’d letSasha down that I began to feel shaky. The necklace was not easily replaceable; its value was emotional.
‘Anna!’ Sasha called.
I could hardly face her and lingered in the Yellow Room where I was checking if the necklace could have fallen out of my pocket. She came to me. The necklace was dangling from her hand. ‘Oh, my goodness!’ I felt almost tearful with relief. ‘Where was it?’
‘Kitty found it in the hall. You must have dropped it.’
‘I’m so sorry,’ I said. ‘What must you think of me?’
‘I think that you made a mistake, but I wish you’d admitted it instead of insisting the necklace was in the bowl.’
What could I say? I didn’t want to say that I remembered putting it in the bowl, because, clearly, I hadn’t. It would make me sound gaga.
‘You’re right,’ I said. ‘I’m so sorry. I don’t know what I was thinking.’
‘That’s okay. But remember, trust is everything.’ She slipped her arm through mine and walked me back to the kitchen. ‘Shall we make a new pot of tea?’
It was just one of a few funny things that have happened lately. When I was trying to read in the drawing room last week, while Olly and Sasha were working, I heard a tapping sound, slow and insistent, coming from behind the fireplace. I called Kitty and asked her if she could hear it and she said no, and I said it had just stopped and she gave me a look so full of pity that I hardly knew what to do with myself. I definitely heard it. It was a rhythmic, deliberate sound. I checked the openings behind the panelling, thinking, as I had before, thatthere might be an animal stuck back there, but there was nothing.
Another difficult thing happened last night. The three of us hadn’t eaten together in a while since we’d decided that there should be no expectation that we should, because Olly and Sasha felt it put pressure on them. I didn’t mind at all. It was tiring to be ‘on’ every night when I was with them, no matter how much I like their company. But last night they suggested we have supper together as it was Sunday. I cooked because it was Kitty’s day off and we shared a bottle of wine. It was lovely. We talked about families. I explained a little more about Nick and my failed attempts at fertility treatment and they were very sympathetic. ‘Maybe you were just meant to give in a different way,’ Olly said.
‘You’re such a beautiful person,’ Sasha said. ‘Our life wouldn’t be nearly as rich without you and everything you do for us.’ Her necklace glinted in the candlelight, and I felt so grateful for their lovely words because I still felt afraid that my grip on things was loosening.
I went to bed feeling a bit tipsy after drinking wine and slept very deeply. In the morning, the mood at breakfast was different. Sasha and Olly’s faces were grim.
‘Do you remember anything from last night?’ Sasha said.
‘No! I slept so well.’
‘You didn’t get up in the night?’
‘Not that I recall.’ For once, my bladder hadn’t woken me up, which was a small victory for me these days, but I wasn’t going to share anything so personal. ‘Why?’
‘You came into our bedroom.’
‘What?’
‘We woke up at half past two and you were standing in the door of our bedroom, staring at us.’
‘No!’
‘I’m afraid so,’ Olly said. ‘It scared the life out of us. Your eyes were open and everything. We talked to you, but you didn’t reply. After a few minutes you walked back to your room.’
‘Do you have any history of sleepwalking?’ Sasha asked.
‘No, none. I’m so sorry.’ I thought of how I must have looked, standing there in my nightgown, which I would never normally let them see me in. It appalled me to think that it might have revealed anything.
‘I’m sure it won’t happen again,’ she said.
