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“She's lucky to have a friend like you.” Just as I'm lucky to have her. She's become essential, what I need to survive. I wouldn't dare say that out loud for fear of overwhelming her, but the knowledge is there just the same.
“Can I ask you a favor?” I murmur, stroking her back, closing my eyes to soak in the wonder of her nearness.
“Anything.”
“Don't ever leave me. I couldn't get along without you.”
She lifts her head, wearing a sweet smile. There's nothing less than love shining from her baby blues, and I would happily drown in it as long as her loving gaze is the last thing I see. “That's something you never have to worry about,” she whispers. “Because I'm not going anywhere. I'm afraid you're stuck with me for the rest of your life.”
I must have done something right if it meant earning this. With that in mind, I can almost believe there's a way out of the seemingly hopeless mess life wants to dissolve into. So long as I have this and there's love at the end of the day, everything else will work out.
BIANCA
“How come you're not trying on any clothes?”
Damn it. I was hoping I’d get away with it.
We’ve been shopping for the past half hour, and only now has she thought to ask why I haven’t picked out anything. I was kind of hoping she wouldn't pay attention. She's having a good time trying on skirts and dresses and jeans. Now she’s frowning at me from the three-way mirror outside her dressing room stall. “Why aren’t you shopping, too?”
I’m sure the response: I don't know how much longer I'll fit into anything. It would be a waste of money to buy anything in my size when I don’t have the first idea of how pregnancy will affect my body... wouldn’t go over well.
“I feel bloated,” I groan, rubbing my stomach. “It's just not a good day.”
“I'm sorry. Would you prefer we go back home?”
I like that she thinks of it as home for both of us. “No, I’m fine. I just know I would hate myself in everything I tried on.”
“You always look great, if that helps.”
“Thanks. And you look hot in that dress.”
She does a little twirl in front of the mirror, hands on her hips. The pale blue color goes great with her blonde curls and sun-tanned skin. “It's cute.”
“I did not use the word cute. You'd be walking around setting off three-alarm fires in that dress.”
For some reason, her smile fades. Instead of looking at her reflection with her usual confidence, she chews her lip—much more of that, and she’ll split it open. “I don't know. Maybe not.”
I never know the right thing to say. I know that whatever comes out will end up hurting her. It's like she doesn't care about looking nice anymore—like she would rather not even try.
Look at what he took from her. I haven't asked Callum about Kristoff, though I hope he's dead. It’s the only thing he deserves.
“It's really pretty on you,” I point out, trying to be careful. “I say buy it but leave the tags on. Try it on again in a week or two, and if you're still unsure, bring it back.”
She runs a hand over the low-cut bust line, the thin straps over her shoulders. “Yeah. That's not a bad idea.” She's looking at her body like she's never seen it before, as if she doesn't know what to do with it. I have to look at the floor out of panic that I'll start crying. The last thing I want is for her to think I pity her. I do, however. There's a burning pain in my chest that only spreads when I look at her.
“What about all this?” I gesture to the pile of clothes in the dressing room that she decided, for one reason or another, she didn't like.
“I don't want any of those.” When I absently start picking things up, she scowls at me. “Stop. I can clean up after myself.”
“I’ll help you. It's not like I'm doing anything else.”
“I feel bad. You should’ve said something about not feeling up to shopping today.”
I didn’t think of it until we were already at the store. The life growing inside me is at the forefront of my mind pretty much all the time. Oddly enough, I didn’t give any thought to shopping with somebody who doesn’t know I’m pregnant. I’m too practical to buy something for the sake of appearances, although that’s what I should do if I want to keep her in the dark.
I have to tell Callum first. I wish I could find the right time. Only there’s always something going on. He’s in a meeting, or busy with Romero, or I have to go to work. He’s been under so much stress lately, too. I still don’t quite know how he will take the news. I don’t want to ruin anything by telling him at the wrong time.
