AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“You know, the other day when we had to go to the hospital to remove his stitches, Matty had one of his extreme seizures where he just convulsed on the floor, looking like he was possessed. It almost broke me. He’s still looking for Mom and Dad.”
“That must’ve been tough.”
He looks at me intensely. “I have no idea what would’ve happened if he’d lost Bjork forever.”
“I’m glad I could help. I guess it was just meant to be.” My lips stay parted, with the intention of hinting that we should probably say goodnight—again.
Rob reaches out to me, tugging me closer. His breath quickens, and no doubt his pulse is racing just as fast. There are barely millimeters between us. I can see in his face that he’s fighting with himself. His hand crawls behind my head, massaging my nape. This time he parts his lips, and only then do I realize that my mouth has started a premature chain reaction.
My brain calls for an emergency shutdown. I desire him, but this is beyond frightening. Maybe I shouldn’t say ‘meant to be.’ He might’ve mistaken it asus. What I really meant was the whole situation with Bjork and Matty.
“Rob… um…”
“Ah, God.” He withdraws, biting his lower lip. “I… um… sorry, that was stupid. Really stupid.”
I’m not ready for a kiss yet, but I want to stay here with him. Besides, I don’t think a kiss is the answer to whatever he’s looking for tonight.
He nudges himself away from me, leaning back and staring at the table in front of us. “I’m so sorry.”
“Forget about it. Let’s start again.”
He nods, although he doesn’t look comfortable. “So, what’s your story, Amber-Rose?”
Thunder blasts in my chest.I was abused by my partner, he destroyed my face, and he almost killed me.“It’s just me and my Mama. The shop, and the bears, and the dolls. And my lovely customers.”
“Simple, huh?” He has no idea. “What about your dad, if I may ask?”
“He died of bowel cancer.”
“I’m sorry to hear that.”
I wish Papa was here. I would’ve asked him:do you think Rob is right for me? Do you think I’m right for him? Is it too soon to try again?Just like the way he answered my other boyfriend questions, he would’ve taken my hand and said, ‘You’ll never know for sure. But look him in the eye, and then feel it inside. That’ll be your best answer.’
Do I dare to look Rob in the eye now? After turning down his kiss?
I decide to have a quick glimpse. His benevolent blue eyes almost disappear behind his lids. I touch the tip of his fingers. “You haven’t been sleeping, have you?”
He shakes his head and grimaces. “These days, I sleep better on this couch.” Rob stifles a yawn.
“Well, sleep here, then. I’ll go back to my room.”
“I’ve taken so much of your time,” he says. “Time isn’t money like they say. It’s even more precious, so I really appreciate it.”
“And it’s been time well spent.”
“Good night,” Rob gets up, and then disappears, probably to his room. He doesn’t want to sleep here after all.
I stay put, still feeling heavy from rejecting Rob’s kiss. I trust him fully, but it’s not the kind of trust that a lover has. I trust him to be around me, for company, as a friend, a soul to lean on. But it’s not love,yet.
Rob comes back with a blanket and a pillow. Heisgoing to sleep on this couch, as he said.
“Oh, you’re still here?” He sets down the things he’s carrying.
His magnetic eyes keep me in place. I can’t leave him. How could I? Somewhere within his sturdy frame, there’s a wound. It might be invisible, but I can feel the pain. I still believe a kiss is not the answer tonight, but I may be able to relieve his anguish and give him reprieve––that is, the sleep he desperately needs––by being a friendly presence in his seemingly fractured life.
“I’ll keep you company.” I lean into him when he sits down.
He gives a long sigh, as if relieved I’m still here despite his attempt to give me a kiss I didn’t want. He puts his arm around me, then covers us with the blanket—a big one, too. My legs are exposed, wearing only his baggy sweater. As we shuffle into position, the hair on his legs gently rub against my calves. I hope he has a good night’s sleep, because I know I will.
